Chapter 392 - 135: [I Always Thought There Was Something Wrong With Him!]
Chapter 135 [I Always Thought He Had Issues!] (6700)
For those who are not familiar with Chen Yan and only had brief encounters with him, they might get the impression that he is an easygoing young man who is willing to be kind to others.
Indeed, this is not entirely wrong. From a young age, Chen Yan has generally been willing to get along peacefully with people, rarely taking the initiative to get into conflicts with others, and seldom losing his temper.
But if we delve deeper, what circumstances would lead a person to have conflicts with others?
In most cases, it’s because you have certain demands on others—these demands might be reasonable or unreasonable, but when others can’t meet your demands, you become angry.
Your roommate stays up late and makes noise; you ask them not to, and they don’t listen—when legitimate demands are not met, it creates conflict.
You have feelings for someone, but they don’t like you and reject you, so you hold a grudge. You ask to borrow money, and they don’t lend it to you, so you become angry—these are cases where unreasonable demands are not fulfilled, leading to conflict.
There are many such examples.
But to summarize, most conflicts arise from the pattern of "having demands on others which are not met."
However, Chen Yan rarely has conflicts with people. The deep underlying reason is not that he is easygoing or kind to others.
It’s that he has no expectations of others whatsoever.
In his bones, he is indifferent to everyone.
I have no expectations of you, so naturally, I have no demands.
The incident where Xiaozhao was saved by Chen Yan was not because Chen Yan was particularly fond of standing up for justice.
The reason Chen Yan jumped in to save Xiaozhao then was purely because of: repaying a favor.
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At that time, Chen Yan really wanted to buy a new winter coat for the old lady, but as a poor student, he didn’t have much money. It was difficult to scrape together from his living expenses alone.
So he sought out the well-known figure on campus, President Zhao, hoping to earn some money by working part-time with him.
Xiaozhao was kind-hearted and helped find some work for Chen Yan, allowing him to earn some money.
To be precise, Xiaozhao helped Chen Yan buy a new coat for the old lady.
The money wasn’t important, the help wasn’t important, what mattered was the old lady’s new coat!
This favor was recorded by Chen Yan as owed to Xiaozhao.
Because of this, when Xiaozhao accidentally fell into the water, Chen Yan didn’t hesitate and jumped in to save him.
Essentially, it was a cold thought process: I owe you a favor, so I repay it.
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Chen Yan’s indifference stems from his childhood.
The old lady, esteemed as the Venerable of the Domain Realm, was of no use when it came to child education issues.
The old lady could teach principles, and Chen Yan was willing to learn them—but principles are cold.
Out of extreme respect for the old lady, and with the old lady occupying the number one position in his heart, Chen Yan memorized and diligently adhered to the principles she taught him.
But the old lady couldn’t solve one fundamental problem: she couldn’t remove the indifference towards the world from an orphaned child.
Many people don’t understand: children are the most ruthless group in the world.
This ruthlessness isn’t evil or bad; it just is "ruthlessness."
Due to incomplete cognition and morality, children lack awareness of many ruthless acts.
Many have witnessed children gleefully catching a bug, a bird, or a frog and then stomping it to death, cutting it open...
Catching a dragonfly and breaking its wings...
These acts aren’t out of malice but from not having a concept of "life."
When a child catches a dragonfly and breaks its wings, it’s not because they hate or want to kill it.
It’s because they don’t understand what life means; they just think it’s "fun."
And in their fun, they kill.
Not understanding, lacking a concept, causes the "ruthlessness" of children.
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Chen Yan’s childhood was filled with such "ruthlessness."
When a group of children are together, and everyone else has parents but you don’t, you naturally become the lowest in the chain of contempt, the target of everyone’s bullying.
You naturally become the target of everyone’s jokes.
The old lady made up stories about Chen Yan’s birth mother.
Whether it was about being a White Fox or being adopted...
They were well-meaning stories and lies from the elder to the child.
But the tales among children were far more ruthless.
"An orphan without parents"—this was still considered mild.
"I heard Chen Yan’s father was a criminal and was executed!"
"Chen Yan’s mom abandoned him and ran away with someone else!"
Chen Yan must have heard countless such remarks and various mocking insults in his youth.
There is no difference between country children and city children in this regard.
In their eyes, it wasn’t about using these rumors to hurt Chen Yan; it was simply... "fun."
Making up lies was just for fun.
Bullying Chen Yan was just for fun.
And then, they just carried on with the game.
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Humans are social animals, and most people cannot help but gravitate towards collective groups.
Even kids playing in the countryside want to integrate into a group and play together.
Chen Yan also wanted that once.
And indeed, he did, only to become the lowest in the chain of contempt in the circle.