Something stood in Yu Jitae’s way.
A lot of them.
Following the current that was bringing organisms into the depths, they surrounded Yu Jitae with moderate distance between them.
They were mermen, protectors of this ocean and the turtle. At the same time, they were also cleaners that picked up trash scattered across the ocean.
They had the face of a squid and the body of a human but their outer shells were tough like steel plates and their sparkling scales were as if they were made by combining small daggers.
…or so was Yu Jitae’s guess about their appearance since he couldn’t see what was ahead either. For a second, he wondered why they would be here but soon came to the conclusion that it must have been because of the turtle’s command.
It was troublesome.
Telling Yeorum that he would be in the same circumstance as her during the training was not a lie. He had completely removed all his blessings and authorities, absurdly so, to the point that he found it ridiculous now that he thought back on it.
Because of that, he couldn’t see nor hear and also felt a detached sense of time just like Yeorum.
“—-”
“—-”
While saying something to themselves, they approached.
He contemplated what to do.
If he were to bring back his power, the turtle above would definitely notice it. Although it wasn’t impossible to kill the turtle, needlessly making it a bigger problem that costs him both time and power wasn’t something he was willing to do.
And naturally, Yeorum’s training would also be ruined.
On the other hand, there would increasingly be more elements towards the depths that had an impact on the mind, among which were things that even Yu Jitae wanted to avoid as much as possible.
Examples were visual and auditory hallucinations that rendered the prey powerless – poison that the hunter injected into its prey.
The mental exhaustion was troublesome already and yet there were a lot of mermen on top of that. Due to the nerve acceleration substances, each movement will appear slow and it might feel like months of fighting.
So how was he supposed to approach this…?
He pondered on and on until one of the spear heads almost landed on his forehead,
He then finally made a decision.
It was a decision made for Yeorum;
He released the child’s hand.
***
It’s alright. There’s no way he would abandon me. Being over-dependent is not good. He said we were partners. There must be a reason. It’s all for me. He’s also having a hard time. He is also in pain. You felt it yourself.
Coming up with every possible reason, Yeorum tried to understand the situation but it was interfered by a sudden surge of emotions.
Why did you let go?
Why?
Why would you let go after coming this far!?
What’s happening?! What is it! Tell me!
Why are you doing this all of a sudden? Is it really just to teach me more?
Or did something appear? What was the fluster for?
What is there to be flustered about! You said you knew everything here! Was that a lie? Can’t you just put those abilities back on, save me and go out? Why would you be startled!
Tell me! Hurry up! Say something to me! Huh?!
I, I’m dying here!
Hurry up and grab my hand again!
Huh?
Uhh?
Huhhh!?
Ah…
Or is it that…?
Were you annoyed by me poking your hand?
It hurts right? There was something warm flowing out there. It’s probably blood… but I wasn’t in my right mind and I didn’t know.
I must have been a nuisance. Even though things are already rough for you…
But it wasn’t intentional…
I won’t do it anymore. This time I’ll be docile and simply hold your hand, hnn?
Come back. Come and hold my hand. Nn? Please.
…Nn?
Ahh…
No. I had it wrong all along.
Now I get it.
It’s because I was relying too much.
Right. It must be that.
Partners should help each other and yet I was only relying. Mana won’t gather without me being desperate right?
Of course, it’s true that you are the one that forced me to come along although I was scared…
Ah, it’s not like I’m blaming you or anything…
Anyway, it’s because I need to overcome it by myself right? Your goal was to make me struggle by myself for survival, and that’s why you let go.
So, you’ll come back if I wait through all the hardships right?
You will come back and hold my hand right…?
Yes…?
…
But, make it quick.
I’m, not good at waiting…
.
.
.
Yeorum waited.
But no matter how much time passed,
Yu Jitae did not come back.
Nerve acceleration substances pervaded into her body. Like paint spreading on the canvas, it settled itself in her mind and heart.
This intense substance which, with enough amount, could even throw an average adult dragon’s nerves into confusion radically accelerated her concept of time.
In her mind, ten days passed.
What was fortunate was that she did not have to move – her body was in the current and was diving deeper by itself.
Yeorum spent her time with her body crouched like an hibernating animal; like a dragon entering a deep slumber.
From time to time, her breath welled up in her throat. The diaphragm spasm that lashed at her chest happened more and more often.
Now, it wasn’t so hard to psychologically endure the pain but her body acted differently. Whenever the diaphragm spasm occurred, her body subconsciously crouched itself even harder, and the muscles around her neck tightened as her hand blocked her mouth on its own accord.
Ughh, ughkk.
Enduring through the suffocating pain, Yeorum remembered the excursion venue called ‘Valley of Wind’ that she had visited with Kaeul.
The breeze there was very refreshing. Kaeul had thrown her arms wide open to breathe in the air, and told her to do the same thing… Back then, she didn’t do it but Yeorum now wanted to try it.
Thus, Yeorum unconsciously breathed in and came to herself only after the water came flowing in through her nose. Coughing repeatedly, she had to once again hold her breath.
No matter how long she waited, Yu Jitae did not come.
.
.
.
A month went by according to her mind.
The first severe coldness of her life was making her body freeze. She shivered and trembled. Sometimes, it got better… but the chilliness would suddenly come back without any notice.
She expected herself to get accustomed to coldness after so long but that wasn’t the case. Her fingertips and the tips of her toes were especially more freezing so she kept her hands closed in a fist and pulled her toes.
At one point, it was so cold and painful that she instead wanted to cut them away from her body, and after shivering from the cold for a month, she came to a conclusion that it wasn’t a bad idea.
The fact that she could recover even the lost parts of her body through polymorph added more weight to her plan.
Therefore, she placed her finger into her mouth.
And closed her teeth.
Putting power into her chin, her teeth dug through the skin and muscles all the way to the bone.
—-
Something snapped, but it was fine.
She couldn’t even see it nor hear the sound of the snap. Even her sense of taste and smell were hazy now and the pain only lasted for a second.
Yeorum spit out the thing that was in her mouth.
The severed finger was no longer cold – there were only 9 to go.
At this point, Yeorum was not in the right state of mind.
Suddenly she remembered what happened in the past. When she was randomly lying down in the living room, Bom reproached her saying that human females had to make sure their stomachs were warm… while needlessly throwing a blanket over her stomach.
Thinking back on those times, Yeorum brought her hand to her stomach.
Her stomach was as cold as a layer of ice.
It would be nice if there was a blanket…
No matter how much she lowered her head, her mouth did not reach her stomach.
One thing that made her hesitate was that Yu Jitae might be flustered when trying to grab her hand if she no longer had any fingers.
But despite all the waiting, Yu Jitae did not come back.
.
.
.
It was quite a while ago that Yeorum had lost her sight and hearing from the mana of the depths and after a month had gone by according to her senses, she had even lost her sense of taste and her sense of smell.
The only remaining thing was the sense of touch and this acted as the sole device in reminding her of her own survival as well as the flow of time. From the pain she felt through her wounds, she perceived that she was still alive.
And by closing her eyes and feeling the pulsations of her heart that softly shook her body, she understood the absolute time.
But after half a year went by in her head.
The pain weakened and the pulsations of her heart started to become even gentler.
Before then, Yeorum was able to differentiate herself from the world. The flow of water she felt with the outside of her skin was not part of her body, and the movements of the organs happening inside the skin were all parts of her body.
And yet now that even the sense of touch had vanished, Yeorum could not tell how much was her own self, and how much was the world.
Later, when she could no longer even feel the pulsations of her heart, it became impossible to calculate the flow of time. She remembered a brain floating inside a container that she had seen on the internet – only the mind existing without a body.
That was exactly what her current self was like.
Even then, Yeorum held on without trying to escape.
Although she couldn’t even tell the direction now, she believed that Yu Jitae was undergoing the same ordeal as herself somewhere nearby, and believed that he would come back for sure.
Whatever the reason may be, the reason he let go of her hand must be because he hadn’t given up yet.
He must be holding on for my sake without giving up…
But as the pain continued endlessly, her mind became as exhausted as it could get. Extremely unhealthy thoughts sometimes made it to her brain and from time to time she cursed her precious things for that rage to help her through the pain.
The biggest anguish was in time.
She did not know how long she had to wait for it to end,
Nor did she know how long she had waited.
After missing the flow of time once, she started turning sceptical about the time itself. Yeorum decided to conduct a test – she decided to count down after saying A.
A.
…
…
…
…How many minutes went by?
10 minutes? Hmm.
An hour? Hmm.
A day? Hmm…
A month? Hmm…
1 year? Hmm…
10 years? Ah…
As the unit increased endlessly, she stopped the experiment and shook the thought away from her head, because all the hours and days seemed plausible.
As she endlessly and vacantly waited for Yu Jitae buried in both darkness and thoughts,
Something began to whisper into her ears.
***
‘Hey’.
It was a familiar voice.
‘Yeorum. Do you hear me?’
And unbelievable at that.
‘Do you remember my voice?’
How could she ever forget it? It was the voice of her youngest unni.
‘Can you hear me? Say something.’
Yeorum could not reply.
Even though she tried opening her mouth, she wasn’t certain whether it actually opened or not, and she couldn’t tell whether the trembling of her throat would result in any sound.
Despite that, she tried to reply.
Telling her precious youngest unni,
That she was listening.
‘Ah, it seems you can hear me fine.’
The moment Yeorum realised that they could communicate, her mind woke up in a flash. Meanwhile, a corner of her mind remained doubtful because her youngest unni had died in front of her eyes.
Her body thrashing around in pain after being bitten on the neck by the oldest unni that slowly came to a stop vividly existed in her unforgetting memories.
‘I’m here to bring you along.’
Me?
Amidst the darkened world, a small face floated up.
The one that found food for her young starving self; the one that brought her, who stayed holed up in the corner of the hatchling’s lair, outside to show the mountains and rivers of the world,
…It was the face of the one whom Yeorum had loved the most.
‘Let’s go together…’
Her youngest unni floated a smile facing Yeorum.