Chapter 265: Painful But Necessary Decision
"They haven’t changed at all..."
I stayed silent.
But why did she sound like she knew a lot about me than she should have? Wasn’t a month too little time to know about a person this much and compare them with their new version?
Or...
Was my past self acquainted with them even before that? Like when he was in the kingdom’s royal academy, or around that period? It could be possible. I didn’t have any idea of those periods after all. And he might have hidden it from the family.
But that wouldn’t make sense either, since he was around 11-15 at that time. How and why would he be in a relationship? To the point of agreeing to an engagement?
He was just a boy.
There was another possibility, too.
Like... Her knowing those possible past or future timelines. The first, the second, or other threads.
Maybe I was really in love with her supposed daughter in one of them, or something like that.
Then it would make sense, too. This possibility even suited her earlier words. Perhaps she was talking about them, not my current memory loss...
But... I didn’t dare to take a gamble.
Because if I were overthinking by myself and revealed it, I couldn’t imagine the consequences.
Even if my guess were correct, it would still be disadvantageous for me because I didn’t know anything about her. And if she really remembered those possible threads... Then her power must be beyond my current measurements of this world. Right, even stronger than Virion.
Then, I guess, I should just continue being me.
I glanced at her and asked. "Alright, I will trust you for now. But can you tell me something else? How and why did you meet my family? How did you become so friendly with Mother too?"
"Oh!" She seemed pleased by my question, her expression brightening as if I’d finally asked something she was willing to answer. "That’s simple. When I was coming to finalize the engagement between you and my daughter, I helped your family to survive a crisis, and saved your mother in the process."
My eyes widened at her words. A crisis? Mother almost died?
My heart throbbed, but I managed to calm it down.
Mother didn’t write about it in the letter... She probably didn’t want to make me worried.
"Then, I sincerely express my gratitude. I will repay it in the future."
"So you will marry-"
"Except that." I interrupted her. "I still don’t know many things, so it will have to wait till I regain my memories."
"Well, alright, at least you’re not completely rejecting it. Even if you did, hehe~" She laughed mischievously, which sent chills down my spine.
She was definitely threatening me.
I need to switch back.
"You can ask for something I can do. I will do it as long as it is reasonable and appropriate."
"Well, don’t worry, in fact, it was just me repaying you." She smiled faintly. "You don’t know how much you helped us. Think of it as a payback for saving my daughter."
Hmm?
That makes me even more curious now.
Who exactly is her daughter?
Hm...
Wait! Could it be her?
The person who triggered the fifth unknown storyline? The one from the ’A Light In The Abyss’?
I had been wondering who could be watching me and how exactly it gave them hope...
It made sense somehow.
Since Nisha admitted she was watching me, her daughter could have been watching me too.
Although it might have been a bit far-fetched, it wasn’t completely impossible.
"Anyway, back to the topic," she interrupted my thoughts this time, "we talked about you and my daughter, and I told your mother about the engagement. She was willing to agree after hearing you agree to it. But she still wanted to hear it from you. She must have thought you were being threatened or agreeing to the engagement against your will." She chuckled at the end.
"...I wasn’t, right?" I asked, looking at her suspiciously.
"...What do you think?" She looked at me with that same playful gaze.
...
"Alright, then can you tell me why you visit today?" I decided to ask another important question. "You... You don’t want to reveal that... that I’m alive to them, right?"
"..." She went silent, increasing my suspicions.
What if she really reveals it? All my hard work would have been for naught then.
"Don’t worry, I won’t tell them that you are their son." She smiled, speaking vaguely again. "But, I decided to give them some hope. Honestly, I pity them. Your mother. You. Both of you are suffering because of your ’death’. Although I understand it was the only logical decision you could reach to protect them and yourself, it’s still a heavy burden for you all. And I just want to lessen that burden for them."
"..." I nodded. I had been thinking about it all the time after all. If I really made the right choice. Or was it a mistake?
But after seeing my family, I didn’t think it was a mistake.
"You’re right." I smiled back. "But they will slowly adapt. And my death will fade someday. More importantly, they will be safe. At least not by the ones who were after me."
"..."
"So, please don’t give them hope." I looked at her calmly. "I think you have an idea how cruel it would be to give them false hope and then take it away again."
Her expression grew somber at my words, the playful glint in her eyes dimming.
"...You’re right," she said quietly. "False hope can be more devastating than despair itself."
She was silent for a moment, seeming to consider something carefully.
"But what if it’s not false hope?" she asked with a knowing expression. "Don’t you believe it too? Don’t you think that there’s a way for you to return to them someday? Without pretending to be someone else? When the danger passes or when you’re strong enough to protect them?"
I felt my heart skip a beat at her words. She read me like a book.
But I had to be realistic. I didn’t want them to suffer and wait who knows how long.
"...That’s a thing to think about later. And if a word gets out that I might be alive, I don’t know what those people will do again. But I’m sure they won’t leave my family untargeted."
"Even if they did, how long would it take me to return?"
"I know it won’t be short. That’s why I can’t bear to see them wait for a person who might not even return."