Chapter 2: The Most Unreliable Cheat Code
Translator: J_Squared Editor: J_Squared
"Michelle, you have to believe me!"
If it were not for his bound hands, Kubei would not have hesitated to choke Annie right there and then.
Kubei’s ears were about to grow boils from hearing this.
From the moment Kubei guessed that Annie killed Sally, Annie had been defending herself and repeating the same words. Michelle silently pulled Kubei away from his chair, and dragged him out of the underground basement, as if Sally never existed.
They then began their journey to the Lithur family treasury.
It was the dead of the night, and they silently trekked across a dark forest.
Michelle walked in front, and was in charge of leading the way. Kubei’s hands were bound and he walked in the middle. Annie was guarding Kubei, and walked behind the other two, while making sure that no troops were chasing behind.
Consequently, they advanced really slowly.
Not because the two women were physically unfit, but because of Kubei.
He intended to buy himself more time.
On the other hand, His body could not bear the walking anymore.
It was not Kubei’s actual body, but the body he was teleported into, this Sir Lithur’s body, that was just physically too weak.
Kubei would not usually exercise but his body would be nowhere as fragile as the body he was occupying. It was like the body of a ten year old, like a diseased person. His throat would turn dry from walking a little faster, making it hard for him to breathe. This sort of weakness felt like it came from the bones within, and it would spread to every cell of the body. He felt as if he would pass out anytime.
Sometimes, he would even experience random migraines.
Kubei suspected, even if he managed to escape from Michelle’s grasp, this body would probably faint in the middle of the jungle and end up feeding the beasts in the jungle anyway.
The chances to escape diminished by half.
He could not rely on himself at all...
"Guess I can only rely on the Lithur family troops," Kubei murmured to himself.
"Based on the torture this body has endured, you’ve been kidnapped for three days. Three days and they’ve not tracked you down. It seems that the Lithur family are terrible at tracking. I can already come to a conclusion, if you rely on the troops to escape, the success rate is only ten percent."
A cold robotic voice came from within his mind.
Kubei was not at all surprised.
He wished he could choke this voice to death just as much as he would choke Annie. From the moment he left the underground basement, he had been tormented by this voice.
It appeared around three hours ago.
When Kubei left the underground basement, a sharp pain followed, and this voice started ringing:
"The System is returning to its factory settings, please wait......Hello, how can I be of service to you?"
The moment the voice first surfaced, Kubei thought he teleported again.
He quickly noticed that Michelle and Annie could not hear this voice so he suspected that he might’ve been experiencing a mental breakdown.
"You can choose to believe that you’ve gone mad, and commit suicide. Or you can choose to believe that a sophisticated piece of artificial intelligence has emerged inside your brain to help you overcome all difficulties, in hopes of achieving great success," said the voice in response to Kubei’s doubts.
He felt like it made a lot of sense, and there was no way to retort it.
He has his own System. This kind of scenario was common in many teleportation related novels. Nothing could be any stranger to him ever since he found himself teleported to this place.
If there were cheat codes, this would be it.
"Well, tell me, almighty artificial intelligence, how do I escape from the grasp of these two women while relying on my own capabilities to survive in this jungle?"
Kubei asked this expecting an answer.
"If you require human assistance, please press zero."
A digital screen appeared in front of Kubei.
Kubei was shocked.
He looked around, and was relieved to notice that Michelle and Annie did not react.
As his hands were bound, Kubei had to make use of his body movements when he walked, to press the zero button with his nose.
He did this sneakily without anything noticing.
"Teet......teet......teet......Hello, how can I be of service?
Kubei asked once more: "How can I survive after running from these two mad women?"
"If you require human assistance, please press zero."
The digital screen appeared again.
"..."
Kubei decided to believe that he had gone berserk. This ridiculous robot voice and those familiar digits probably were illusions.
Under the stress of teleportation and death threat, his mental health probably had gone out of shape.
Yeah, that must be it!
Kubei ignored the illusion.
But this illusion refused to leave him alone.
"Teet......teet......teet......Please be notified that you have a new mail."
"Recently, I’ve been playing a game called ‘Legendary Dominance’..."
"Please turn right in front in twenty meters."
"...Recalculating."
He felt as if he had heard more nonsense in this journey than the rest of his previous life before this teleportation occurred.
But if the digital screen could broadcast all these information, it was probably not an illusion.
If he took a more optimistic view, Kubei could tell the source the robotic voice. From these spam mail, it was probably from the real world, and it was accidentally inserted into his brain during teleportation.
This did not make much scientific sense at all, but since he already teleported, could he still rely on science?
He could now only regret why did he not appreciate iQiYi’s ninety minute ads. The thing playing in his mind right now was that ninety minute ad, and even if he wanted to continue his membership it was far too late.
Kubei never felt so hopeless before.
If this was what he received as a cheat code, he would rather choose death instead.
"Can you stop? Or shut down, just keep quiet for a moment, thanks." Kubei said this in his head.
"Hello, I do not possess this function."
Kubei could not be bothered about getting angry.
"Well, could you tell me then, what the hell are you capable of doing?"
The System replied: "I have the largest databank ever."
After hearing this, it piqued Kubei’s interest a little.
A databank, even if it did not sound like an impressive function, but he had yet to understand this world at all and so perhaps the databank could be of good use?
What if possession of huge amounts of data was tantamount to possessing great power?
His teleportation journey did not seem to be as bad now.
After giving some thought, he asked the System: "Well, what kind of data do you have right now?"
"Checking hard drive...... A file detected. Opening the files. Please hold on. "The robotic voice did not sound as annoying as before.
"The file was successfully opened......Under the flow of time, we’ve ridden the wind and waves, gone into the concrete jungle, we’ve given our all. In these happy days, we’re extremely grateful and welcome that everyone could make it here today..."
"..."
Kubei thought it sounded familiar and did not sound right.
Was this not the speech he was preparing for his boss before he got teleported?
"You can shut up now."
Finally, he understood: this System was his five year old laptop, and it had somehow merged with his handphone’s system.
Before teleporting, he was burning the midnight oil and using his computer. Due to exhaustion, he fell asleep on the computer. Because of this, when teleporting, the computer system somehow merged into his consciousness.
His cell phone was placed on the table, and it could have been teleported along as well. His GPS was installed in his phone.
This hypothesis seemed illogical, but how else could he explain this situation? He had teleported. These items that emerged with his mind, seemed to have also evolved. It could not even be turned off and it continuously played spam messages.
He had accepted his fate.
Why are the Systems in the novels all so powerful? Even if the main characters were useless, they would be carried to their way to success. After so much effort, he had finally gotten his own System, but it was as useless as the main characters in the novel.
He felt really bad.
Maybe it was time he removed the viruses in the computer.
"Your script has grammatical errors, the System recommends amending it to..."
"Shut up."
The System kept quiet for a while, then said: "Your writing is horrible."
"Shut up!"
"The System recommends...."
After some thought, he asked the System once more: "Have you thought of a method to let me escape successfully?"
"..."
The world was finally quiet.
Kubei finally felt relieved. The surroundings he was in right now was already dangerous enough, he did not have time to be bothered by a useless System.
Michelle might find out the truth eventually, then kill him right away.
He was like a fugitive stuck in an escaping game with a difficulty level equivalent to hell. The enemies would watch him closely, and he had barely any weapons. What was the worst of all was that this game even had a time limit!
Once the allotted time had lapsed, the game would end in a bloody and brutal way.
It was not easy getting the System to stay silent, in this rare moment of peace and quiet, Kubei should think of ways to escape!
But, one’s needs are never met...
"Michelle, you have to trust me!"
The System’s voice only stopped for half a minute, Annie’s poor voice followed.
Kubei could not take this anymore.
"Michelle, I..."
Kubei interrupted her:
"It was only murder. Could you please stop?"
Annie was behind him, therefore he did not know how she was going to react. Right when he was done talking, a strong force hit onto his back. Kubei’s body was weak and was not able to stand still. He collapsed and took in a mouthful of mud.
Annie kicked him to the ground with just one kick.
From the corners of his eyes, Kubei could tell that Annie was furious. In comparison to the way she treated Michelle it was like she was a different person.
Two lashes of a whip followed.
The fiery and painful sensation travelled up his back, it made Kubei clench his teeth while having cold sweat.
Kubei understood, how Sir Lithur died previously. Even if this body was healthy, it would not be able to handle such fierce beatings. Pity that Sir Lithur was far weaker than a normal person.
Anger rose from inside him.
He should have known, Annie might look weak, but was actually a cruel person. He never thought she could get so furious with Michelle’s presence and show such a scary side of her!
Michelle did not appear surprised at all.
"Stop hitting him, Annie, he’ll die."
She half-heartedly persuaded her.
"Michelle, he was accusing me. This cunning noble is trying to tear us apart! Please don’t believe in anything that he said! "Annie raised her head, facing Michelle with sincerity. "I swear, Sally’s death has nothing to do with me."
Kubei tried to suppress his rage, and struggle to stand up.
Right now, he could only endure the pain.
But it did not stop him from feeling disgusted at Annie.
"She said Sally went missing, why now is she saying Sally is dead?"
The robotic voice resurfaced and gave Kubei a shock.
"That’s why she’s stupid." Kubei shook his head, speaking to the System, "Oh yeah, could you not appear so suddenly..."
"If you require human assistance, please press zero."
"..."
Kubei was tired of this malfunctioning System. He returned his attention to Michelle. He wanted to know how Michelle was going to handle this situation.
If they were to argue, this would probably be the best time for him to escape.
But, Kubei was left disappointed once more.
Michelle turned out to be just as stupid as Annie.
"It’s okay, Annie. I believe you." Michelle walked in front of her, then held her hands.
The atmosphere became warm immediately.
"We both managed to climb out of the darkest corners from Havenwright together, we struggled to survive under the rule of the Church together. " Michelle grasped Annie’s hands tightly while saying this, "All these years, all that we’ve been through, what reason do I have to not believe you?"
Kubei could not believe what he was witnessing.
"Michelle, I..."
Annie looked at Michelle, her tears started flowing.
"Annie, do you still remember our dream?" Michelle voice became so tender suddenly.
"Yeah!" Annie suddenly jumped into Michelle’s embrace, and said: " One day, we’ll build a kingdom. Every inch of soil would have nothing to do with the Church, every mage would be free to walk under the sunlight, and not have any fear of being burnt on a stake."
She cried loudly in Michelle’s embrace.
Kubei was stunned.
Actually, this conversation was helpful to Kubei. After hearing of all the church and mage kind of stuff, he already has an idea of what this world’s setting was.
This piece of information was useful, he should be happy.
But in his heart, he could not resist saying "What.the.hell".
These two mad women with weird tempers, were a moment ago awkwardly silent, and Annie was careful when talking to Michelle. Shortly thereafter, the two were embracing each other in an intimate moment. How did it end up like this?
The absurdness of this situation was as frustrating as the possibility of watching Obama being ripped apart by Bear Grylls and eaten alive.
The mood of the atmosphere changed way too quickly, and Kubei was unable to react accordingly.
The two seemed to have a really intimate relationship.
Kubei shook his head. Michelle and Annie were hugging and did not notice him shaking his head.
Even the System commented with its cold robotic voice saying:
"What a touching pair of lilies!"