237 Benefits (3)
“I was going to put her in the carriage since that was what the Baron wanted me to do. As the butler, who am I to go against what my employer wants to do with his daughter?” James asked. There was nothing he could have done back then with his low status.
“You could have morals and not let her be sent away. I remember you having to convince Sally to follow me. Seems back then you were aware of the type of people you worked for and knew you’ll get nowhere staying in the late Baron’s home. Seems like something in you changed-”
James interrupted Edgar by saying, “The Baroness has been putting the house back to its former glory. It would be worthwhile for me to stay and be the butler. Everyone can’t be born with a golden spoon like you and not have to worry about how they’ll eat tomorrow. I simply see a good opportunity before me. You do know me to judge me.”
“Quite frankly I am not judging you. I’m giving you a warning. Let that night I took Alessandra away from her home be the last time you listen to someone’s orders to do anything to her. A man like yourself shouldn’t get tangled up in this mess. Find your morals before you go so far you won’t be able to recognize yourself,” Edgar advised James.
There was a chance that James was just happy to sleep with a woman like Katrina or he was receiving something in exchange for his services. So far the only person the Baroness seemed to care about other than herself was her daughter. James could be disposed of at any moment but whatever he could gain from Katrina was blinding him.
“I still have my morals,” James stated but then he felt a pang in his chest as he remembered telling Mario’s secret and poisoning Clark for Katrina. “I do not need a man like you speaking about morals. I have heard about the things you have done in your life. Does Alessandra even know the real you or are you just pretending to be a hero in front of her?”
Edgar shook his head at James’s stupidity. “This town is so stupid. It makes me wonder if I am as stupid as all of you for not moving,” he muttered. Why on earth would he have to pretend in front of Alessandra?
When Edgar was with Alessandra, she would see his playful side because he enjoyed messing with her and she was fun to be around. People who claimed that was not the real him were normally the ones who piss him off so, of course, they would not see his playful side. Piss him, try to kill him, mess with those he cares about, and you would see this ‘monster’ side of him. Why did people poke at him and expect him to smile back?
James would like it if Edgar would move. “You should apologize to the Baroness for cutting her face. She was not deserving of it.”
.....
“Sure,” Edgar replied, making Caleb look at him like he had grown another head. “When everyone in that house apologizes to my wife for the things they’ve done, I will apologize to the Baroness.”
James could not respond to this since neither Katrina nor Kate would ever apologize to Alessandra for the things they did. The servants would because of Alessandra’s new status.
“I cut a small part of her face while one side of my wife’s face is full of scratches because of jealousy. Yet you want me to be the one doing the apologies. I take back my words about finding your morals and leaving that house. You fit right in with the rest of them. Now that I have a better understanding of the type of person you are, I will keep an eye out for you-”
“If you are planning to kill me just get it over with,” James interjected as he did not want to be paranoid waiting for it to happen.
“It’s no fun when you accept death so easily. Besides, you will be responsible for your own death which is why I am leaving you alone after you tried to help send my wife away. When your world comes crashing down because of the decisions you made, do not blame me or anyone else. It is all you,” Edgar said then tapped the carriage to make it stop. “You can get out now.”
James looked outside and saw that they were nowhere near the Baron’s house. “We have not arrived there yet.”
“I said I would give you a ride. I never said I would take you all the way there. I do not enjoy being in close proximity to that house since I start to itch. Be thankful that I was generous enough to take you this far. Instead of calling me a monster, call me a saint,” said Edgar.
James did not reply to Edgar’s words and stepped out into the cold weather with the bags of food which were sure to be frozen by the time he reached his destination. Before he could safely step away from the carriage, it had begun to move and one of the wheels almost went over his right shoe.
James did not take too kindly to the way Edgar was looking down on him and was offering advice he did not need. There were plenty of people in this world who took advantage of the opportunities before them so why was he being judged? What did he owe to Alessandra who now lived a far better life than he did? What did he owe to Mario or Clark?
At night it was hard for him to sleep as he recalled how betrayed Mario looked each time they locked eyes in the kitchen but Mario was never his friend. They were only servants in the same household. It wasn’t like he had it easy either. Whenever Katrina was in need of relieving stress she would call for him and he would have to please her late into the night.
‘It is wrong,’ James thought.
This was the same woman who had threatened to claim he had taken advantage of her but then she turned around and took advantage of him. James was aware he could not trust Katrina but the more he visited her at night, the more he saw her in a different light.
Katrina had not been wrong that he would watch her and admire her body before Desmond died. He was jealous of Desmond many times so once he stopped feeling used by her at night, he started to enjoy making love to her.
James stood still as he thought of how his mother would judge him for the things he had been doing recently. She would never look at him the same because of how she had raised him to be. However, nothing in this world was free, and taking care of his mother was quite expensive. Why shouldn’t he use Katrina for money and enjoy the pleasure that came with it? Everyone else would.
James dragged himself back to the house where he found the carriage Katrina and Greta had used to travel to the Duke’s home. He shook the snow off of his body before he entered and immediately felt like the energy in the house was off.
“James, it’s about time you returned. Have the maids tidy my room and wash the dresses on the floor. I can not take another second of my mother and grandmother arguing,” Kate rolled her eyes as she walked by James and went out the front door.
‘They were arguing? I should-No,’ James caught himself before he could start moving to check on Katrina. It was not his place. Still, he could not fight the emotions in his chest and not leave her alone. ‘I am a fool,’ James concluded as he headed towards Katrina’s bedroom.