Chapter 20: Should I Text Him?
Orchid Garden Apartment.
Sienna’s heart refused to calm down even after she stepped out of Zachary’s car.
The cool night breeze usually calms and clears her chaotic thoughts, but not tonight. His face kept appearing in her mind, nearly uninterrupted, drowning other thoughts. That calm expression. That cute, faint smile. The way his voice softened when he spoke to her.
She pressed her lips together as she walked toward her apartment building, her steps slower than usual.
’This is bad,’ she thought. ’Very bad.’
Because no matter how hard she tried to think about something else: work, her schedule tomorrow, even her annoying boss, her mind kept circling back to him, Zachary.
Even his name sounded... dangerously attractive now.
She let out a quiet sigh as she stepped into the elevator, leaning lightly against the wall.
’You just met him twice,’ she reminded herself firmly. ’Twice, Sienna. Don’t act like this is some kind of drama.’
But her heart didn’t seem to care about logic.
And that was what worried her the most.
Because she knew herself well enough.
She knew how things could spiral if she wasn’t careful.
’I don’t even know him properly,’ she continued, arguing with herself. ’And what if this feeling grows into something I can’t control?’
The thought made her frown slightly.
She didn’t dare to imagine that path.
The soft ’ding’ of the elevator pulled her out of her thoughts when the elevator reached the tenth floor. The doors opened, and she stepped out, dragging her tired feet toward her unit.
By the time she reached her door and stepped inside, she should have felt relief, warm and safe.
Instead, her feet halted.
Still standing near the door, her hand loosely holding her phone, her expression blank as if someone had pressed pause on her.
Her gaze dropped slowly to the screen in her hand.
The debate in her starts again,
’Text him.’
’No!’
’Yes.’
’No!’
Her brows slowly furrowed.
’It’s just a simple message,’ her heart whispered. ’Just asking if he got home safely.’
’Exactly,’ her mind snapped back. ’Just a message... that clearly shows you’re thinking about him.’
’So what?’ her heart argued. ’That’s called basic manners.’
’No,’ her mind replied coldly. ’That’s called unnecessary attachment.’
Sienna sighed quietly, her shoulders slumping.
’You’re overthinking,’ her heart insisted. ’People do this all the time. It’s polite. Normal. Civilized.’
’You’re not trying to be civilized,’ her mind shot back. ’You’re trying to text him because you want to.’
That thought hit her hard.
She can’t help but take a deep, long sigh.
’...Okay, maybe a little,’ her heart admitted weakly.
’Exactly.’
Silence.
’But what if something happens to him?’ her heart tried again.
Her mind paused.
’He drives a car,’ it replied flatly. ’Not a spaceship.’
Sienna almost laughed after hearing her ridiculous thought.
She ran a hand through her hair, pacing a small step forward, then back again.
’Just text him,’ her heart pushed. ’It’s harmless.’
’And what if he thinks you’re clingy?’ her mind countered.
’What if he thinks I’m rude if I don’t?’ her heart shot back.
’What if he doesn’t think about you at all?’ her mind added mercilessly.
"...That’s rude," she muttered under her breath.
In the end, her heart won.
Of course it did.
With a small, defeated sigh, Sienna quickly unlocked her phone and started typing before she could change her mind.
"Just a quick reminder, give me a shout once you’ve safely landed back in the cozy corners of your home. Safe drive!"
She stared at the message.
Then reread it a few times.
"This is... safe, right?" she murmured softly to herself. "It doesn’t sound too obvious... right?"
She tilted her head slightly, frowning.
"It’s light enough... not too caring... but still polite..." she continued, analyzing it as if it were a report she needed to submit to her boss. "Or is it too much? Should I delete it?"
Her thumb hovered over the screen. Her mind was ready to step in again.
But before it could—
She took a deep breath, shut her eyes tightly, and pressed ’send’.
Done. No turning back.
"...Well," she muttered, exhaling slowly. "Let’s just pretend that didn’t feel like a life decision."
With that, she finally moved, slipping off her shoes and walking further into her apartment.
She placed her phone and bag on the study table without looking at the screen again, as if she was afraid it might already have a reply. Or worse, none at all.
Not giving herself time to overthink further, Sienna turned and rushed toward the bathroom, determined to distract herself before her mind dragged her back into another unnecessary battle.
...
The night had already settled quietly around Sienna’s small apartment by the time she finished everything she needed to do. The soft sound of running water had long faded, replaced by the gentle hum of silence.
She stepped out of the bathroom with damp hair falling loosely over her shoulders, her body finally clean, but her mind... still restless.
Zachary’s face lingered there, annoyingly clear.
She frowned slightly as she walked toward her bed, pulling the blanket aside before sitting down.
"Seriously..." she muttered under her breath, her voice soft but filled with disbelief. "Girl... It’s just dinner. One dinner."
Sienna quickly shook her head and dropped backward onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling as if it might help her regain her sanity.
"Stop it," she whispered to herself. "You sound like a teenager having a crush. Embarrassing! Get a grip."
With a sigh, she reached out and turned off the bedside lamp.
The room fell into darkness instantly, leaving only the faint glow from the city lights sneaking through the curtains.
She closed her eyes.
Maybe sleep will erase him from her mind.
But sleep didn’t come easily. Instead, something else crept in, a dull ache that quietly settled in her chest, growing heavier with each passing second.
Her lips pressed into a thin line.
"Why am I even waiting..." she murmured, her voice barely audible. "He didn’t even reply. Of course, he didn’t because he already forgot me..."