Though he felt a bit of fear towards the phonograph, Li Banfeng’s sleep quality in the Portable Residence had always been high.
Upon waking, he lit a candle, clicked open his pocket watch, and it was ten o’clock again.
Li Banfeng felt thirsty. He bent down to look for water under the bed, but the water bucket had disappeared.
Last night before he went to bed, Li Banfeng had specially fetched a bucket of water from the river, boiled it, cooled it, and placed it beside the bed, but now, upon waking, it was gone.
He knew that House Spirits liked cleanliness.
Li Banfeng held the candle, looking around for the water bucket. After a long search, he found nothing.
It was no big deal if the water bucket was missing; he could always buy another one if he had to.
But something else had disappeared.
The Copper Lotus Flower was gone!
Li Banfeng’s veins throbbed immediately!
Just last night, the Copper Lotus Flower had refined Rong Jin’an’s corpse into two Red Pills. Li Banfeng had personally taken the Lotus Seeds and watched as the Copper Lotus Flower closed its petals in the corner of the wall—how could it have vanished in the blink of an eye?
He searched the entire room several times, but there was no trace of it.
Besides the phonograph, the table and chairs he had taken from the old Home Cultivation lady’s room were missing, and so were the various medicinal herbs he had taken from Decai’s room.
"Darling, where have you put everything?"
The phonograph didn’t respond.
Li Banfeng felt a sinking sensation in his heart and began to suspect the worst.
At this thought, Li Banfeng’s whole body began to sweat profusely.
Holding the candlestick, Li Banfeng carefully inspected the entire room. Even if the phonograph liked to clean regularly, there had to be some traces if someone had come in or out.
He didn’t find any traces, but he did find something incredible.
On the wall opposite the door, Li Banfeng found another door.
The door’s color matched the wall; one had to observe carefully to notice the very inconspicuous hinges and door seams.
Li Banfeng was considering whether or not to push the door and have a look when the phonograph suddenly started playing, startling him into a shudder.
PSSST! PSSST! PSSST!
"Spring arrives and greens fill the windows,
Young lady embroiders mandarin ducks below the window,
Suddenly, a merciless stick,
Strikes and scatters the ducks each to a side!"
This was "Song of Four Seasons."
The song was popular in Medicine King Valley; it was said to be popular throughout the whole of Puluo State.
"Why did you suddenly start to play this song?" Li Banfeng asked directly.
PSSST! PSSST! PSSST!
The phonograph continued to sing:
"Summer arrives with long willow branches,
The lad loves to sleep and won’t get out of bed,
Toiling night and day to add to the household,
I, as your servant, add another chamber for you."
She had changed the lyrics again.
Li Banfeng mumbled to himself, "Are you adding another concubine for me?"
PSSSSSSST!
A long hiss and a mass of steam rushed at him, scalding Li Banfeng so much that his whole body turned red.
It was somewhat painful, but
The sudden appearance of another door in the room obviously didn’t refer to a concubine; it meant an additional room had been added to the Portable Residence.
Li Banfeng pushed open the door to take a peek.
Inside was a room identical to the previous Portable Residence.
Dimensions, design, everything was the same; it was just furnished with fewer items.
Inside was a water bucket, a table, two chairs, a cloth bag, and the Copper Lotus Flower placed on the table.
Li Banfeng’s mouth hung open wide, unable to close for a long time.
The fact that the phonograph could tidy things up was not surprising to Li Banfeng, as her housekeeping had always been excellent.
What truly surprised Li Banfeng was that she could make the Portable Residence sprout another room!
The Portable Residence was a sanctuary built by a Traveling Cultivator for himself.
From the Peddler’s initial description, the Traveling Cultivator’s cultivation level was extremely high.
Yet, the phonograph was able to further expand this sanctuary.
In the midst of his astonishment, Li Banfeng discovered another bizarre thing.
The Copper Lotus Flower was open, and inside it was a Lotus Seed.
In his amazement, Li Banfeng noticed that the cloth bag was also open.
Inside the cloth bag were the medicinal herbs that Decai used for Poison Refining, which Li Banfeng inspected closely. Nearly half of the herbs were missing.
Based on the condition inside the room, Li Banfeng made a guess about what had happened last night.
Li Banfeng picked up the Lotus Seeds and held them in his palm; the Copper Lotus Flower automatically closed.
Shortly after, the Lotus Seeds burst open, and out popped three Green Pills.
A fishy and bitter smell caused Li Banfeng to frown deeply.
Not daring to keep them in his palm for long, Li Banfeng quickly found a money clip and stored the pills inside.
Having been sifted by the Copper Lotus Flower, the remaining ingredients were deemed useless and thus simply thrown away.
Having an additional room meant more space in the Portable Residence, so Li Banfeng, in high spirits, decided to decorate the two rooms.
He called the newly expanded room the outer chamber.
The original room he called the main chamber.
Li Banfeng first moved the bathtub to the outer chamber, as it took up a lot of space.
PSSST!
The Phonograph spat out a burst of steam, sounding very much like a sneer.
Li Banfeng glared at it. "Are you mocking me? Mocking me for living a life of poverty?"
The Phonograph continued to play "Song of Four Seasons":
"A day as spouse grants a hundred days’ grace,
Little Servant dares not laugh at thy face,
Each stitch and line, with painstaking care,
I’ll sort with thee, my lord, fine and fair."
Li Banfeng gritted his teeth. "Just you wait! Once I buy enough nice things to fill a house, it’ll dazzle your Big Horn!"
PSSST! PSSST!
The Phonograph mocked Li Banfeng twice more.
Li Banfeng was angry and on his way out when he heard the Phonograph sing:
"Little Servant’s love runs deep and long,
A First Layer of cultivation to thee belong,
Hundred Flavors Delicate at the tip of thy nose,
Golden Gaze Autumn Hair discerns the ghosts’ throes~~"
Li Banfeng returned to the side of the Phonograph. "What do you mean by ’A First Layer of cultivation’? Does it mean I’ve achieved a First Layer in Home Cultivation?"
The Phonograph didn’t answer.
Li Banfeng persisted, "A Home Cultivator without a House Spirit can’t ascend levels. If you awarded me a First Layer of cultivation, does it mean that you’ve become my House Spirit?"
Still, the Phonograph didn’t answer.
"You really want to be with me? Actually, it’s quite good being with me. I can earn money, support a household, and I will never treat you badly," he persuaded.
PSSST!
The Phonograph let out a sneer.
"Don’t underestimate me; I am now worth a million too!" he boasted.
PSSST!
The Phonograph released another puff of steam.
"You just mentioned that I’ve attained the cultivation level of Home Cultivation’s First Layer. Does that mean I also have two other skills?"
The Phonograph remained silent.
"’Hundred Flavors Delicate at the tip of thy nose’—does that mean my sense of smell will become exceptionally keen? I did notice before that I could detect some poisons by their scent. Now that I have a level, is my nose even more sensitive? What does ’Golden Gaze Autumn Hair discerns the ghosts’ throes’ mean? Do I have the ability to see through things? Can I distinguish ghosts? Are these Techniques all part of Home Cultivation, or are they unique to you?"
"Darling, please don’t ignore me! Say something, don’t just leave me talking to myself. It makes me sound like I’m crazy."
PSSST! PSSST!
The Phonograph sneered again, twice.
Li Banfeng got mad. "Darling, why do you always mock me?"
A cloud of steam floated over, polishing the mirror on the table.
Li Banfeng looked at his reflection, and his eyes instantly bulged.
His face was coated in thick makeup!
Dark black eyebrows.
Deep purple eyeshadow.
Bright white foundation.
And a spot of bright red on his lips.
Li Banfeng demanded angrily, "Who did this? Darling, was it you?"
PSSST! PSSST!
CLANG! CLANG! CLANG!
The Phonograph sang, "Oh my~ my lord, you wrongly accuse your Little Servant. It was that vile Blood-Thirsty who did this!"
Li Banfeng was stunned. "The Blood-Thirsty Pendulum? Why would she do this?"
The Phonograph recited, "It’s just her nature. I consumed her Soul, leaving only some of her Spirit Attribute. That wretch naturally loves dressing up. Use the pendulum once, and she’ll dress you up every time!"
Looking at the pendulum, Li Banfeng asked, "Is this vile creature even worth keeping?"
PSSST! PSSST!
The Phonograph answered gently, "Worth it, worth it. My lord, all Magical Treasures require a price to be paid before use. She simply loves to dress you up; that small price is nothing really."
Li Banfeng scratched his head. "What do you mean ’require a price to be paid before use’?"
PS: Dear readers, it’s the weekend—talk to Shala, or she might just lose it.