It was an emergency.I was suffering from a severe deficiency of physical touch. This condition occurs when one has been indulging in ample skin contact, only to have the supply abruptly cut off.
The primary symptoms included anxiety, restlessness, and hypersensitivity.
Why did the supply cut ?
“⋯⋯ I’m not playing with you.”
“Heuck.”
“I was really worried and sad, but all you did was get all lovey-dovey with Yuri in there. I’m not playing with a dummy like that anymore-!!”
“Heuuuuck.”
My main supplier, CEO Yu of Violet Magic Tower Co., had suspended all exchanges over a minor misunderstanding. Honestly, it felt unfair.
Sure, things got a bit lovey-dovey inside, but it was a brutal fight! Did I really do anything so awful to warrant this level of resentment?
Besides, I had even explained that Yuri’s feelings had been scorched to the point of being as brittle as overcooked green onions due to… unique circumstances. I even demonstrated it in front of her!“Look, Tower Master. Whenever I try to hold Yuri’s hand like this.”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
Shashashack
Pink-Haired Lesbian slipped away and avoided my touch. We had become… people who couldn’t even hold hands.
I would need to gradually bridge the distance between us again. But since we had surged forward with such intense affection before, I couldn’t quite grasp a normal pace.
Thinking back, we had even kissed the first time we met. Did we need to start there again?
No way.
honestly couldn’t think of anything before the hand-holding stage⋯⋯. Just as I was sinking deeper into these thoughts, Yuna puffed her cheeks in frustration.
“ALL OF YOU GET OUT──!!”
She was swinging her Yuna Punch (really painful when it was fully charged with mana) and chased me out.
Why did she explode like that?
Was it really so heartbreaking to her that growing distant from me⋯⋯?
For two weeks now⋯⋯ I’ve been unable to have any form of skinship with anyone.
I used to be surrounded by warmth, clinging, hugging, sharing all kinds of close contact with others. Now, all of that had suddenly vanished, as if it had never existed. The withdrawal was killing me. The warmth, where is the warmth⋯⋯?
I was walking through a winter right now⋯⋯.
===============================================================
I needed someone to get advice from. A way out of this mess wasn’t something I could figure out on my own. I had to seek advice from a master of love.
I wandered around the Academy.
They say if you walk with three people, one will be your teacher. Surely, in this vast academy brimming with all sorts of people, there would be at least one dating expert, right?
Then I bumped into a one-eyed viking.
“Anchovy! Haven’t seen you around lately but I did now. I’m meeting Alejandro for drinks at the bar later, wanna join?”
I swear, I would rather do a one day druid tryouts than seek advice from him. Asking a nearby patch of grass. How to grab a girl.
The sound of rustling leaves would be more productive than an advice given by a forever-alone.
“Disqualified.’
“???”
At my disqualification statement, Alexon stared at me as if I was crazy, but then remembered that I’ve always been missing a screw in my head and nodded.
He thinking whether to smack my head and walk pass, or explain himself further as a fellow male professor comrade. As a man of strong friendship, he chose the latter.
“The Skylark Bar revamped their waitress outfits with some advanced Crownhall culture. We’re going to check it out right now.”
“Then I⋯⋯ am not going.”
I was hit by a wave of memory, reminiscing the time when I made a truce with Pink-Haired Lesbian to visit bar with short-skirts. If we were still close, we could have gone and saw renewal waitress outfit together⋯⋯.
After looking at my face, Alexon asked in a worried tone.
“Your face is completely rotten. What’s the problem?”
“Its a love problem.”
“Ah, so disqualified⋯⋯ you fucker.”
Bonk.
I ended getting a hit.
===============================================================
I bumped into Lil Red Tower while I was passing by. When I gave her a long stare, Selvier crossed her arms and drew a firm line.
“I’m not going to dry laundry for you, Professor.”
“That’s fine but⋯⋯.”
Selvier had a talent to be an advisor. Last time, she even helped me calm down during my panic attack. Maybe she could⋯⋯?
But then, her concept of romance was very linear, too dreamy and sugar-coated.
She was waiting for her childhood friend who was like prince from the fairytales even now at this age. In short, she had no experience with dating whatsoever. Come to think of it, asking about girls’ mind⋯⋯ no, I probably knew more about girls’ minds than she does.
While I was sunk in thought while looking at her, she suddenly stared back at me with a curious expression. Then asked out of nowhere.
“⋯⋯Professor, did you do a make up?”
“?
“? Why are you trying to seduce me?”
“Ugh, shi⋯⋯! Its nothing like that, I was just asking. Your face looks fresh today so…”
“Do you not see the sadness and pain etched across my face Selvier, you heartless creature⋯⋯!!”
I knew it the moment you swapped classes to Cthulhu. How could she look at this weary, gloomy face of mine and make a comment like that?
Maybe she was raising a malignancy too. Laughing when looking at someone with a sad face.
⋯⋯Wait.
On the topic of malignancy, I suddenly realized that I didn’t have any bad thoughts.
More specifically, my inner demon was feeling somewhat subdued by my inner angel. It felt like it was walking in eggshells.
I asked just in case.
“You haven’t achieved Metamorphosis yet, right?”
“Are you making fun of me?”
“Oh yeah, if you got Metamorphosis, you would’ve already challenged that Blue Tower witch to a duel. Then it wouldn’t be mental stability-kind of Metamorphosis⋯⋯.”
“Don’t even mention Snow White in front of me!”
That meant it wasn’t Selvier, it was a reaction of something within me. Was, there some kind of connection between us? No, of course there was.
We grew up in the same hometown. It was just that we don’t remember it.
Past⋯⋯huh.
If I determined myself to face my inner demons, then perhaps it was time to dig through my past too. How did such strange things come to take root in my mind?
“Selvier, let’s catch up later.”
“⋯⋯No thanks.”
With that, I letted her be for now and backed off.
After all, digging through my past wasn’t an urgent matter as closing the distance with two people.
===============================================================
In the end, I couldn’t find any advisors.
Luna the grad school candidate only muttered stasis quo , so when I was trying to ask Princess White Purity, I got lost because her fan club told me to get lost.
Apparently, despite our Princess White Purity being a love expert and knew the answer to every problem under the sun, but that the princess was also a pure maiden, and it would be blasphemy to ask her such a question—or so her followers insisted.
“⋯⋯Please, everybody. Please stop⋯⋯.”
“Don’t worry Princess, we could do this all day!”
“Be gone evil professor! Be gone!”
The sight of the poor Princess White Purity caught in her fans’ relentless admiration was oddly memorable.
It was nice seeing such loyalty among factions, but being treated like the plague sparked a competitive streak in me.
So, I dropped an argument-starting bomb, Make Princess White Purity forever unmarried VS. Understand even if the husband is a little bit weird , then I slipped away.
The fan club erupted into chaos as they splited into two sides and the entire Academy rang with their arguing voices.
Then.
Eventually, I found myself slouched on a bench in the Academy and staring blankly at the sky as evening fell and edge of the night came in. And the stars covered by the sunlight began to appear.
“Huh!”
Stars.
Now thinking about it, there was actually ⋯⋯ one person I knew who could give me some clear advice. Bennett, the one who was living a happy life, juggling two girlfriends!
But then Bennett wasn’t in the Academy. Then I could just write a letter to him. He and I had a history of playing in session together, I was sure he would give me thoughtful response if I took the time to write him a sincere letter.
I started scribbling on the letter in the spot.
Starting with one spoon of flattery ⋯⋯ Greetings, Hero who saved the world.
Then, as I was about to go into the real topic⋯⋯ hm, it shouldn’t be done with nothing given to him. I would need to pay advisor fee. I had a high level of closeness with Bennett, but he wouldn’t be the same with me.
Finding his sister’s body was a session reward, so I didn’t want to touch that. I knew it was efficient to just shake his mind using his weak point, but that was protected by the sacred treaty of TRPG.
Then what could I offer him? First, as a meaning to don’t worry about it
I wrote that we took down 『Virgin that Drinks Pleasure』. That with such a famous Dark Mage beheaded, we would be able to get 『Corpse Flower that Consumes Fear』as well. And that he could ease his mind.
I wanted to give that kind of vibe.
And after that, I went into my topic. I explained some of the situation and asked how I could get along well. Asked him if Niolle and Tara were doing well. Asked if he could give me some dating advice⋯⋯.
No.
“I wrote it too direct.”
Even to me with metal skin module installed, this was a bit embarrassing. Asking a younger guy for dating advice? If you just think about it, its quite scandalous.
Technically, this body was younger than Bennett’s, but including my past life, I would be around 50s. There needed to be some dignity as an elder! So I wrote around it a bit.
Then I sealed it up, then requested the government branch similar to postal office to deliver it.
“⋯⋯Mr. Crazy Wizard, the Defense Bureau isn’t a courier service.”
“It’s a very important personal matter so please, Kirby.”
“Since you saved Yuri, its only for this time⋯⋯.”
Nice. I just needed to wait now.
Bennett, give me a road backwards(回道), teach me a way to clean up this mess⋯⋯!
===============================================================
After finishing my work, I quietly headed back to the lab, only to find the door shut tight.
I gently took hold of the doorknob, easing it open as quietly as possible. But the worn hinges betrayed me even with my kindness and started screaming.
Creaaaak! *
*
Then, Pink-Haired Lesbian and Yuna who were sitting close together on the sofa looked at me at the same time. Pink-Haired Lesbian was seated Yuna was curled up on her lap, a classic and cozy pose.
When Pink-Haired Lesbian met eyes with me, she quickly avoided my gaze, while Yuna glared at me as if she was going to devour me.
It made me jealous that I couldn’t fit into that. It would be so soft and warm.
Right, Pink-Haired Lesbian’s feelings of love for me were burnt to a crisp, so her connection with Yuna was unaffected. But wait. Does that mean Yuna is also a competition⋯⋯?
While I was drowning in confusion, Pink-Haired Lesbian threw me a lifeline.
“⋯⋯We had a little bit of a talk. So, it seems the Tower Master is feeling anxious. She seems to feel threatened.”
“By what⋯⋯?”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
Pink-Haired Lesbian turned her doll-like expressionless face away a bit more. She was staring at wallpaper patterns far far away. She didn’t look at me at all.
I realized after looking at that reaction. I refreshingly snapped my fingers.
“Ah, were you worried that Pink-Haired Lesbian and I might grow distant after having a big fight⋯⋯? Then Tower Master, I’ll mend my bond with Pink-Haired Lesbian immediately.”
“No you idiot──!!”
“??”
The puzzle pieces didn’t fit. Usually, this meant that one of these pieces had to be faulty. There was a culprit in here. One of them was malicious information.
Who, who was spitting lies to muddle my judgment⋯⋯.
The fact that Pink-Haired Lesbian’s feeling of love burnt away, and that our relationship drifted apart was an undeniable fact. I couldn’t even touch a fingertip on that Pink-Haired Lesbian for 2 weeks.
Could Tower Master’s reaction be fake? But to be fake, Yuna was terrible at hiding her emotions⋯⋯?
Then, Yuna’s finishing blow struck down on me.
“I- I really, don’t like you!”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯!!”
“Hicc.”
Yuna let out a shocking words, she clapped a hand over her mouth as if she was surprised by herself too and started to hiccup.
If I remained calm a bit more, I would have noticed her reaction seemed uncontrolled. That this wasn’t her true intention.
But I couldn’t afford it during that time. So.
I froze as if I was a rabbit struck by a lightning, then fell down sideways. As my consciousness started fade away, their worried voices echoed as it faded away quickly as well.
“Heu, heuaat! A- are you okay?!”
“That was harsh, Tower Master. Even if babe was acting dull but⋯⋯.”
“No, this is not, what it looks like⋯⋯ wait, Yuri, you called him, babe?!”
“⋯⋯I have misspoken. Let’s, let’s move him to the bed first.
And I passed out.