The Academy had a limited number of professors, which was more because of the fact that there wasn’t a need for many more.Since students weren’t strictly separated by grade levels, their courses often overlapped, leaving little reason to divide them further.
The Academy was a place of elites. Most nobles were already proficient in their family’s traditional martial arts, so there wasn’t much need for them to learn new techniques. Similarly, the commoners had likely mastered a specialty in order to meet the Academy’s strict cut-offs.
By the time these students arrived at the Academy, they had already developed the foundations of their own combat styles and techniques.
This is why courses like 『Let’s Follow Along: A Fun and Easy Three-Strike Sword Technique』were unnecessary.
So, what did the professors teach, then? They imparted experience. Their role was to make students aware of perspectives they hadn’t yet considered. The Academy’s lessons were rooted in practical, real-world applications.
That was why Alexon, the professor of『Everything About Close Combat』, could teach students across all years. One of his many nicknames was Weapon Master, due to his ability to wield any weapon at mastery.
He could single-handedly expose students to a range of experiences—defeating them with a spear one day and an ax the next.
The same applied to Hardstuck-Silver, who taught『Introduction to Basic Elements』 Although he was a wizard of the Gold Magic Tower, he could wield any magic at mastery as well.
One day, he would overwhelm students with fire, and the next, he’d test them with water-based spells.
As for me, the one teaching 『Countermeasures to Illusion Magic』I was no different. I was able to provide a wide range of experiences in Illusion Magic, like the Tentacle Maze or the Great Rhinoceros Escape⋯⋯.In other words.
The three powerful evil forces dominated multiple subjects and left little room for new professors to enter the scene.
In fact, we were also responsible for a number of resignations among the existing faculty. There was one particular incident before.
An old, retired knight named Jay, famous for his skill with a greatsword, joined the Academy as a professor. However, when it became apparent that Alexon was even more skilled with the greatsword, students flocked to Alexon’s lectures instead.
Furious, the retired knight challenged Alexon to a duel but was swiftly defeated, leading him to submit his resignation in shame.
I didn’t say anything at the time, but I may have been the reason a few other professors left as well.
So⋯⋯ needless to say, our reputation among the faculty was pretty bad. When livelihoods were at stake, tensions tend to rise quickly.
And the result of all this tension? This (not quite) all-staff gathering.
“ Nom nom , Alejandro, care for a game of arm wrestle?”*
“Before you ask, compare my compact, aesthetically refined muscles to that bulk of yours. My physique is more of an artistic masterpiece, designed for admiration rather than actual use. How about we try using our brain cells instead? There’s a new puzzle from the Magic Tower—how about we⋯⋯.”
“We’re a bunch of men drinking; who needs brains right now? Enough of that mind-numbing stuff. You’ll just brag for half an hour anyway, and it’s already annoying just thinking about it.”
“I see. You’re intimidated by my superior intellect. But sometimes, learning from someone more brilliant than yourself can lead to personal growth, you know⋯⋯.”
And that was why this group of men, who didn’t even get along, was sitting here drinking together. Alexon took another swig of his beer, clearly irritated by Hardstuck-Silver’s condescending tone.
When Alexon didn’t react, Hardstuck-Silver turned his attention toward me.
“Ah, even though you’re a wizard who still hasn’t reached Metamorphosis yet⋯⋯ you are still a wizard. Would you like to try solving the Gold Magic Tower’s latest problem?”
“Let me see.”
“Yes, hmhm… If it’s too difficult, I can give you a hint. But remember, learning and growing independently is key to development, so I’ll refuse twice before giving one. The third time, though, I’ll drop a subtle clue—just enough to preserve the intellectual thrill.”
I glanced at the magic puzzle that Hardstuck-Silver had scribbled onto a parchment. I paused for about ten seconds. I had to at least pretend like I was thinking about it.
“Struggling? If you start from the left corner, you’ll notice the magic circle resembles⋯⋯.”
“It’s a praying mantis. The answer.”
“⋯⋯How dare you use Black Magic⋯⋯!!”
Hardstuck-Silver couldn’t accept that his so-called unsolvable puzzle had been cracked in 10 seconds. He pulled out the Holy Emblem of Goddess then began waving it around.
But after failing to detect any trace of Black Magic, he sipped his beer with a gloomy face. He muttered how unfair it was that it had taken him a whole week to solve.
Meanwhile, Alexon roared with laughter with a satisfied face.
“This is priceless. There’s always someone better, my friend! Why were you so arrogant! Come on, let’s have a drink to that
“You must have suffered a lot.”
“You have no idea. Every time we drank, I was on the verge of losing my mind as he rambled on and on about his ‘intellectual pleasure.’ I even considered splitting his head with my axe, but that didn’t seem to work either. We just ended up fighting.”
Ah, so they fought.
“But now, I’ve grown used to him! Let’s just say I’ve figured out how to handle him⋯⋯ Watch this.”
Alexon grinned mischievously, then turned to Alejandro.
“You are the best wizard in the Academy!”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯!!”
“Just kidding.”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
How did his expression change so quickly? It was like flipping a switch. His sensitivity to compliments was oddly low.
My suspicion that high-level wizards often had a few screws loose further solidified.
“You’ll hear about it soon, but apparently his personality ended up this way because he couldn’t get over a heartbreak. Poor guy.”
“Heung, isn’t it more tragic to have never experienced love at all?”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
A sad and bitter silence fell over the table. Both professors raised their glasses, their eyes reflecting some old, deep wounds. It seemed like their lives had been far removed from any romance.
But wouldn’t success in life naturally lead to relationships? Both of them were strong enough to be professors at the Academy⋯⋯.
“⋯⋯When I was young, I lived for revenge! So I never paid attention to things like love or family. But now that I’ve achieved everything, I find that it all feels empty⋯⋯.”
“A wizard’s life is lonely. A constant struggle against the limits of your own research. There was a time when love bloomed for me too, but she left just as quickly as she came. Now, I’m stuck, forever trapped in that beautiful season⋯⋯.”
“He’s not saying she died—he got dumped. He never moved on from his first love and ended up missing out on every other chance. Don’t dwell on it too much.”
“I get it. Dating⋯⋯is tough. I haven’t had any luck myself either.”
I nodded in sympathy. In this life, I hadn’t really experienced anything close to a real relationship. At that, both Hardstuck-Silver and Alexon’s expressions turned a bit strange. Alexon leaned forward and asked.
“I’ve heard rumors you’re always surrounded by women. Like that pink-haired woman in the suit.”
“Ah, she’s a friend. Sure, we share a bed and sleep together sometimes, but we don’t see each other romantically.”
“You, what about that other woman? People say they’ve overheard you chatting in your lab with someone who has a cute voice. Said her voice was practically dripping with sweetness. What about that one⋯⋯?”
“Ah, well, things are a bit more complicated with her. Sometimes it feels like something more, but it’s honestly closer to family⋯⋯?”
Alexon fists began to clench as he asked.
“Do you sleep with her too?”
“Yes, every night. But that doesn’t mean we’re dating, right?”
I found myself reflecting on the past—specifically, on my ex-girlfriend, who had introduced me to TRPGs. We started dating because I thought turning her down would ruin my reputation in college, but looking back, it was exhausting.
I’d rush to her side whenever she called, even in the middle of the night, carry her bags at the mall, and attend her friends’ gatherings so she could show me off as her boyfriend. it was just to boost her social status.
It was a really tiring thing. This thing called dating.
Spending time with Pink-Haired Lesbian and Yuna, though, was fun. With them, I didn’t think ‘dating’ would be such a chore. But was it really worth the risk of disrupting what we already have?
Quietly, I came to a conclusion.
“Maybe it’s better to avoid dating altogether.”
“You fucking bastard.”
“Come outside!”
I ended up taking a few hits.
===============================================================
As the drinks kept coming, the mood lightened. With the alcohol kicking in, I could feel the tension melting from my body.
The conversation wandered from topic to topic. We debated over what the strongest weapon might be (Hardstuck-Silver and I ganged up on Alexon, advocating for the supremacy of magic theory), and we discussed who the prettiest professor at the Academy was (I nominated myself).
Then the subject shifted to students. Alexon grumbled as he crunched on walnuts.
“I’m getting old. I think it’s time I took on a successor disciple.”
“Isn’t it a bit early for that? That sounds more like a decision for someone in their sixties.”
“Well, wizards pass on knowledge through sight and speech. But for warriors like me, we have to ingrain our techniques into muscle. I thought Bennet would be my successor⋯⋯.”
Right, Bennett was Alexon’s disciple.
He had approached me after Alexon recommended me as a ‘wizard skilled in killing.’ That’s how Bennet ended up getting into TRPG, and eventually, he became a Paladin.
“Do I owe you an apology for that?”
“No, not at all. Bennet seems to have found his own path, thanks to you⋯⋯ if anything, I should thank you. His sword no longer carries the weight of killing intent. It’s just… well, it’s a bit of a shame.”
“Why not just pick some big, brawny musclehead? Someone from the slums would probably be eager to learn.”
“What’s the point in passing on knowledge like that? Oh, by the way, Bennet writes to me from time to time. He mentioned getting caught up in some strange business.”
Strange business?
“Do you know anything about Hero?”
“Uh, a brave and righteous person, right?”
“That’s one interpretation, but it also refers to someone chosen by God. Heroes usually appear when some disaster befalls the world. The last Hero appeared about a few hundred years ago, and⋯⋯.”
Apparently, Heroes are individuals selected by God during moments of crisis. They only appear in times of great danger, so they don’t show up during peaceful periods like the present.
In the absence of a God-chosen Hero, the Church of the Goddess held their own Hero selection tournaments.
“Bennett is traveling with Saintess Tara, isn’t he? The Church of the Goddess has a rule that the Saintess must join the Hero’s party. So, if things don’t go his way, he could lose her to the Hero’s party.”
“What kind of bullshit is that?”
“My thoughts exactly. Thankfully, there’s no Hero from the Church of the Goddess right now, but they’re holding a Hero selection tournament in the middle of the year. If Bennet doesn’t want to lose Tara⋯⋯ he’ll have to win that tournament and become the Hero himself.”
“Huh.”
Bennet, you sure are living an eventful life.
It’s surprising that Bennet sends updates like this to Alexon. Then again⋯⋯ it wasn’t like Bennet and I were ever particularly close—our “friendship” was always one-sided on my part.
Still, it left me feeling a little bitter. We had spent a lot of time together, after all.
If I had said it was Illusion Magic and not Dimensional Magic, he probably would’ve tried to split my head open with Guardian’s Dream. No, Bennet’s head would be gone instead—Tower Master did that, not me.
Maybe I should send him a message to check up on him. Last I heard, Bennet was headed to the Eastern Front, so there’s a good chance he ran into Elaine too.
I was curious. All these stories seemed to be unfolding behind the scenes.
And the Church of the Goddess, huh⋯⋯.
Something has always seemed off about them. I had been ignoring it because more pressing matters kept popping up, but it might be worth digging deeper. Could even make for good session material.
“ Hicc.”
While I was lost in thought, Hardstuck-Silver, his face flushed red, started hiccupping. If only he were a woman, I thought, he’d make quite the comedic heroine character.
Just then, Alexon abruptly stood up and hastily wrapped things up.
“Well! I will be going now.”
“Huh? You’ve still got beer in your glass.”
“I just remembered something urgent. Goodbye!”
What’s up with him?
I stared at Alexon’s back like a fool as he fled in a hurry. I was a bit drunk myself, so my head wasn’t working right. What was he up to?
“You, this is a story from when I, Alejandro, was a young man⋯⋯ hicc. There was this woman I really liked. What was her name again? Ah, yes, Isa—Isabella. I met her at the Magic Tower.”
“Oh.”
“You… this is a story from when I, Alejandro, was a young man… hicc ⋯⋯.”
“?”
Ah.
As I listened to Alejandro’s love story, which repeated like a broken record, I finally understood why Alexon had run away.
I tried to make my escape as well, but Hardstuck-Silver, this drunk-ass wizard, looked like he was about to burst into tears. I couldn’t bear the thought of a middle-aged man breaking down in front of me, so I sat back down.
After hearing the same story for the third time, I was starting to feel dizzy and suffocated. I even considered using the Illusion Magic to knock him out and slip away. But the worst part was…
Each time he retold the story, new details emerged. A multi-layered drunken saga, huh? I couldn’t resist the urge to unravel the puzzle and get to the heart of the matter, so I endured the tedious repetition.
By the time I began to suspect that Isabella might actually be the mastermind behind the Serial Killing of Ancestors Case and maybe even a Succubus in disguise, I couldn’t handle the alcohol any longer and blacked out.
The mistake was thinking I could drink like I used to in my past life. This new body couldn’t handle alcohol the same way.
As I drifted off, I vaguely felt someone carrying me somewhere.
===============================================================
The scent of alcohol lingered in the air.
Yuri Lanster walked along the moonlit street, the strong stench of liquor radiating from the person slumped over her back. A passed-out Crazy Wizard.
She had combed through all the bars near the Academy, growing worried about how late it was getting. When she found him, he was face down, fast asleep, while Professor Alejandro was on his 35th retelling of his love story.
Yuri knocked Alejandro out with a quick punch to the head and dragged the Crazy Wizard out of the bar.
As she carried him, Yuri let out a deep sigh and scolded him.
“Can’t even hold your liquor, huh?”
“⋯⋯⋯I-I can. I’m n-not drunk.”
“What kind of conversation had you drinking this much? Please tell me it was at least interesting.”
“D-dating⋯⋯ about dating.”
Dating, huh.
“So, you were talking about wanting to date someone? Or something like that?”
“⋯⋯Uh, more or less.”
She felt a little mischievous. Since he was this drunk and answering everything so obediently, she thought this was the perfect opportunity to get some blackmail material. Yuri Lanster subtly asked.
“How about me, as a dating partner?”
“Dating, I don’t mi⋯⋯.”
Tuck.
Yuri’s steps faltered for a moment before she continued walking. His response was within expectations. It wasn’t something to be surprised about.
They were coworkers, and had been friends for a while. Yuri herself had only asked as a joke. So, it wasn’t a big deal. She wasn’t shocked. Not at all.
“Well, I get it. Makes sense. I’m a Succubus. Not exactly ideal dating material.”
“Dating⋯⋯ I wish I could skip dating, and go straight to marriage⋯⋯.”
“⋯⋯What?”
Tuck.
Yuri Lanster’s steps stopped once again. Her voice raised, slightly higher-pitched than normal, as it echoed into the night.
“What do you mean by that⋯⋯?!”
But there was no reply.
===============================================================
“⋯⋯My head is killing me.”
“Oh, you idiot. I’ll make you some honey water, so hold on!”
“Okie.”
I listened to Yuna’s words and obediently laid down.