201 Recalling
Lumian was taken aback, his eyes widening in surprise as he glanced at the vacant seat across from him. With a polite tone, he mustered, “Hello.”
In that instant, a memory from his sister Aurore flashed through his mind. She had once mentioned an intriguing phrase: Expert consultation!
Although I’m not entirely surrounded by invisible Psychiatrists, there are two of them, and I can’t detect them either… Lumian muttered inwardly.
The woman sitting opposite him fell silent, while Susie’s voice assumed a more relaxed and lighthearted tone.
“It seems the newspaper has left a lasting impression on you. Does that mean it had a positive impact?”
“Yes,” Lumian replied candidly.
He had reached a point where he could confront the emotional turmoil within him instead of burying it deep down. Otherwise, he would have tried to avoid any encounters with “Red Boots” Franca, as she invariably brought up Aurore.
Naturally, this evoked intense waves of emotion.
Susie skillfully redirected the conversation back to its original path.
“If you wish to further investigate any unusual coincidences that have occurred during this period and identify their underlying sources, I can assist you.”
“I won’t delve directly into your memories, but I can awaken them all and present them chronologically before your eyes. Of course, this excludes those hidden deep within the recesses of your subconscious. They pose too great a risk,” Susie explained.
“Are you willing to give it a try?”
Lumian didn’t hesitate for a moment.
“Yes.”
Whenever he noticed any coincidences around him, he would occasionally recall his recent experiences and meticulously scrutinize the corresponding details. Now, he was merely shifting to a more effective approach.
“Lean back fully against the sofa, relax, and close your eyes…” Susie’s gentle voice reached Lumian’s ears unhurriedly.
Just as he adjusted his sitting position and prepared to calm his mind and close his eyes, a sudden “volcanic eruption” erupted within his thoughts.
This unexpected “attack” caught him off guard, leaving his subconscious unable to effectively shield him.
Magma and smoke burst forth like luminous specks, each containing a distinct scene.
The multitude of glowing dots arranged themselves chronologically, giving Lumian the sensation of watching a play with himself as the central character.
It unfolded in a blur, yet every detail remained vivid and complete.
As the temperature soared, Lumian’s mind raced, threatening to release wisps of white smoke.
He witnessed each scene and recalled every detail, skillfully connecting them and searching for any abnormalities.
Lumian’s eyes widened, and his facial features contorted in visible distress.
The memory that should have been present was now a void!
In that moment, a gentle female voice resonated within his mind.
“Has it truly vanished, or have you forgotten or overlooked it?” spoke the lady seated across from him, her tone devoid of its previous cheerfulness.
Like a lightning bolt, it illuminated Lumian’s mind, casting light into the darkest recesses beyond his subconscious.
Lumian’s expression grew increasingly pained, and he couldn’t help but bow his head as he struggled to say, “I-I see it, I see it…
“I was in conversation with the angel sealed within me!
“H—His name is Termiboros!”
At last, Lumian recollected something that had slipped his memory.
The corruption contained within his left chest was, in essence, an angel who believed in Inevitability—Termiboros!
Initially, he had intended to seek guidance from Madam Magician on how to harness the angel’s powers and avert any potential negative consequences, but he had completely forgotten about it.
“Is this the corruption sealed within your body?” Susie’s reaction appeared unsurprised, her voice maintaining a calm demeanor.
Lumian instinctively exhaled, his fingertips reaching his forehead, already dampened with cold sweat.
He truthfully replied, “Yes, He attempted to entice me into aiding His escape from the seal, but I refused. And then, I simply forgot.
“This is truly… truly bizarre…”
Termiboros is undeniably sealed within my body and can’t break free, yet I was unwittingly affected by Him!
“That’s to be expected. One mustn’t underestimate any angel, even when sealed,” Susie offered an explanation to allay Lumian’s immediate apprehension.
The unknown was always the most terrifying.
She continued, “In ancient times, angels were also referred to as subsidiary gods. This implies that They possess the essence of a deity. Even when sealed, They can exert a certain influence upon the external world through various means.
“Did you, perhaps, believe that with the seal of the great entity, the corruption upon your chest was more akin to a boon? As long as you follow the correct procedures at the appropriate stages, you shouldn’t encounter any issues apart from enduring greater pain and assuming a certain risk of losing control.”
Lumian fell into silence, recognizing that he had entertained similar thoughts of late.
“You must remember that in such matters, the potency of a curse is no less than that of a boon, if not stronger,” warned Susie. “I don’t know how Termiboros has influenced you, but given His belief in Inevitability, I suspect His primary aim is to induce a deviation in your destiny.
“However, you needn’t worry excessively. He is, after all, sealed, and His capacity for influence is considerably limited. Moving forward, as long as you continuously assess your condition and consistently seek guidance on your actions, you can largely circumvent this predicament.”
“Alright.” Lumian retrieved a pen and paper and hastily jotted down a memo.
The note pertained to consulting Madam Magician regarding Termiboros.
He feared succumbing to the angel’s influence from the realm of Inevitability and forgetting these pertinent matters once the treatment concluded.
Lumian carefully stored away his pen and paper, releasing a slow exhale.
“Now that I’ve recollected the events involving Termiboros, I feel considerably more at ease. It appears that my spirituality had detected something.”
“I can perceive an improvement in your mental state,” affirmed Susie, echoing Lumian’s sentiments.
Taking advantage of the moment, Lumian posed a question, “Ladies, do you believe that Susanna Mattise has been fully eradicated by the official Beyonders? Or should I continue searching for clues at Théatre de l’Ancienne Cage à Pigeons to prevent her from launching another attack?”
Taking note of the time, Monsieur Ive, the landlord of Auberge du Coq Doré, should soon find himself in dire straits.
Susie offered a gentle smile as she replied, “The Spectator path isn’t well-versed in divination.”
Seated across from Lumian, the “invisible” lady smiled and added, “Madam Magician is a divination expert. Did she not provide you with an answer? Or perhaps her hidden message eluded your understanding?”
She didn’t say anything… Lumian pondered for a moment, recalling Madam Magician’s response regarding Susanna Mattise.
Suddenly, he froze.
Madam Magician had continuously guided him on how to resolve the issue with Susanna Mattise, subtly hinting that he should seek assistance from Mr. K.
From a different perspective, she had never once considered the possibility that Susanna Mattise had been entirely eliminated!
In her view, this predicament would undoubtedly resurface!
Isn’t it too ambiguous? Or does she assume it’s self-evident and fails to emphasize it? Lumian mumbled to himself, nodding in realization.
“I know the answer.”
As Lumian spoke, he made a connection based on the manner and demeanor exhibited by the Psychiatrist seated opposite him when addressing Madam Magician.
Could they also be members of the secretive organization that employs tarot cards as their code names?
To which cards do they correspond?
After making some adjustments, Lumian sought clarification about his mental state.
“The mere thought of meeting Louis Lund fills me with anxiety, excitement, and adrenaline. I can’t seem to control my emotions. Is this a severe psychological issue?”
Susie responded in a soothing voice, “That’s actually quite normal. People often exhibit similar behavior when it comes to matters they deeply care about. You’re just a bit more intense than usual.
“If you didn’t react this way, I would have been concerned that you were facing a more severe psychological problem and had repressed all your emotions.
“What you need to focus on now is not being fearful or overwhelmed, but rather learning to manage those emotions.”
Normal… Lumian felt reassured by Susie’s explanation, and his concern regarding the matter at hand subsided, allowing his mental state to stabilize.
He pondered and asked, “Manage them?”
How do I do that?
Susie replied, “The simplest method is to always remind yourself not to overreact. Whenever you feel a similar surge of emotions, take deep breaths and find your calm.
“It may sound easy, but in reality, it’s quite challenging. When emotions flare up, it’s difficult for humans to maintain rationality. They rarely think about controlling themselves. By the time they regain their composure, they often find that they’ve already made a mistake.
“I can set up a trigger for you. Once your emotional reactions exceed a certain threshold, it will remind you of my words and assist you in regaining your rationality, allowing you to attempt to regain control.
“This is a temporary solution. In the long run, it will depend on your own efforts. However, once you become accustomed to self-reflection during times of heightened emotion, the issue will become more manageable.
“Are you willing to give it a try?”
“Alright.” Lumian had no qualms about accepting external assistance.
At some point, Susie’s voice took on an otherworldly and elusive quality. It felt as though she had said a great deal, yet Lumian couldn’t recall a single word. The only thing he could remember was her concluding statement: “The trigger has been set. If all goes well, it will last for two weeks, perfectly timed for your next session. At that point, we can decide whether to make any adjustments.”
Lumian briefly acknowledged her words and assessed his mental state.
After more than ten seconds, filled with both fear and anticipation, he inquired, “Is it possible for me to attempt to awaken more buried memories from my subconscious?”