Chapter 654 - 654 – Apathy
Silence.
Deafening silence.
Gravis had gone through intense emotional turmoil, and he felt like he had reached the absolute bottom. He felt like he had lost control over his entire life, and the worst thing was that he accepted it.
If Heaven weren’t powerful enough to kill him right now, would he have still done this? Would he have handed over his children?
Gravis wasn’t sure.
He wasn’t sure about anything anymore.
Gravis’ human form began to regress more in age until he only looked to be about twelve years old. He felt like a child under the control of adults. When adults talked, children were supposed to be quiet and follow what the adults said.
"Don’t overdo it," Heaven said. "Look at yourself. You feel like a child now? Stop feeling sorry for yourself. This situation all stems from your decision to fight me. Don’t escape into your childhood to dodge responsibility."
Gravis gritted his teeth.
’How pathetic am I?’ he thought with frustration.
In a matter of seconds, Gravis returned to the body of a young adult.
’So what!?’ Gravis thought with gritted teeth. ’I’m not dead! My family isn’t dead! Heaven is right! Everything stems from my arrogance! I have made this choice, and I need to bear the consequences!’
’I have already reached rock-bottom! It can only go up from here!’ Gravis thought.
’Yes, I have taken a huge setback, but only when I give up will I truly lose! I might have failed in having a pure path to power. I might have failed in reaching supreme power without the highest Heaven’s help, but I still have my dream of freedom! Isn’t freedom my most important goal!?’
’Yet, is this true freedom?’ Gravis thought as uncertainty returned to his being. ’Is it truly my choice to forgive Heaven?’
Gravis violently shook his head.
’This is a problem for the future!’ he thought with narrowed eyes. ’Just because I can’t see a way out now doesn’t mean that I won’t see a way out in the future. I must trust in my future self! I believe my past self to be an arrogant idiot, and my future self will think of me as an idiot! Yet, to make my future self a reality, I must pull through now!’
Sadly, no matter how much Gravis tried to motivate himself, he still felt uncertainty and helplessness deep inside.
’I can’t hang onto these feelings of uncertainty right now,’ Gravis thought with gritted teeth.
Then, for the first time since he had talked to his mother, Gravis suppressed his emotions again. He knew that this was risky and that it may endanger his eventual future, but if he couldn’t access his full power right now, he would never reach this future! For now, he had to return to his old, cold, emotionless self.
Everything came naturally. Unlocking emotions was hard, but if one managed to suppress them once, it came naturally to suppress them again.
Gravis’ eyes became cold and emotionless as he glanced at the world.
He didn’t care about this dead world.
He didn’t care about Heaven.
He didn’t care about his friends.
He even didn’t care about his children.
Yet, Gravis knew that all the pain would return in the future.
This was only a temporary state of mind, but the longer he remained inside it, the harder it was to get out of it again.
But Gravis accepted that. Right now, this was a price he needed to pay.
BOOOOM!
Gravis managed to understand a new Law, but instead of being happy, he only despised it.
He had just comprehended the level two Law of Apathy.
Suppressing one’s emotions was running away from them, and Gravis knew that. But so what!? If he had to run away to survive, so be it!
"You have just comprehended your first Law that not even I know," Heaven said.
Gravis looked evenly at Heaven. "How come?" he asked coldly.
"Because I don’t run from my emotions and my love for this world," Heaven said.
Gravis didn’t want to admit it, but that comment stung.
"Even when you slowly killed my child, I didn’t run away," Heaven said. "Would you also become apathetic if I were to slowly kill your child?"
"What’s the point of this meaningless show of superiority?" Gravis asked emotionlessly. "I have already accepted that you are more powerful than me right now. You don’t need to act all high and mighty, or is this your way of hurting me because your ancestor suppresses you? Is this meaningless, pathetic comment an attempt to hurt me?"
For the first time, Gravis saw some emotion inside Heaven’s eyes.
For just a brief moment, Gravis saw boundless rage and hatred.
BANG!
All seven eyes of Heaven exploded into a shower of blood.
Gravis only coldly looked on.
"For a moment, I have betrayed my undying faith in my ancestor," Heaven said evenly. "Let the permanent loss of sight be my punishment."
Gravis sneered. What was up with this fanatic zeal of worship?
"Apathy is the running away from emotions, which is a weakness," Gravis commented, "but a weakness can have its strengths in certain circumstances. Yes, I’m running from my emotions right now, but thanks to that, I have managed to grasp a power that you don’t have."
WHOOOOM!
Gravis activated his Will-Aura. "Do you feel it?" Gravis asked with a smirk. "Apathy is a domain of death and stagnation. All life and meaning die inside of it. Together with my Law of Minor Death, my Law of Suppression, and my Composition Laws, my Will-Aura has gained another effect."
"You can argue about what is weak and what is strong all you want, Heaven," Gravis said. "You say that running away from your emotions is weak, but if running away allows you to become more powerful, then isn’t it a weakness that your pride disallows you from running away?"
"This is an empty show of control," Heaven said evenly. "You are not in control right now, Gravis."
"Yes, but you aren’t either," Gravis said with a smirk. "We are both under the control of the highest Heaven right now. We are both doing what it wants. So, aren’t we the same right now?"
"You and I are not the same," Heaven said. "In comparison to- "
"Stop spouting useless shit, Heaven," Gravis interrupted Heaven. "Let’s start with the relevant topic."
"So, how am I supposed to become powerful?"