Leo
The ride back to our villa was quiet, the hum of the engine a steady vibration against the leather seats of the transport car.
The rain had completely stopped, leaving the island roads black and glistening under the passing streetlights. Even though I was dressed in the dry, warm clothes Miller had brought me, my hands still felt cold.
’’I am so sorry, miller,’’ I whispered, my voice barely carrying over the quiet hum of the air conditioning.
It felt like the hundredth time I had said it since we left Gerald’s estate, but the words still didn’t feel like enough to erase the image of the blood on his face.
"I should have kept my breathing under control. I should have recognized the physiological signs of my cognitive overload before I let my Enigma side slip. It was entirely my fault."
Miller didn’t answer right away, but he didn’t pull away either. He kept his hand firmly locked in mine, his thumb rubbing slow, reassuring circles against the back of my knuckles. "Leo, stop," he said softly, his voice low and tired but completely devoid of any anger. "We already talked about this at Gerald’s. You don’t have to keep apologizing."
"But I do," I insisted, turning my head to look at him in the dim interior of the car.
My chest felt tight, my chest heaving slightly as the residual anxiety from the night refused to leave my system. "The physical impact of my shove was not a standard human reaction. The force was fueled by a sudden, violent surge of my pheromones. If you had hit the wall at a slightly different angle, the impact could have caused a subdural hematoma or a severe cervical spine injury. I could have killed you, Miller. I am a medical professional and I know the structural limits of the human body, and I completely ignored them because I was angry."
"But you didn’t kill me," Miller said, turning his face to look directly into my eyes. His green eyes were calm, reflecting the passing lights of the resort. "Look at me, Leo. I have a tiny scratch on my temple. That’s it. I am completely fine. You need to let the guilt go."
"I can’t just let it go," I muttered, looking down at our joined hands. "My father spent his entire life letting his raw, crazy strength take over. He justified his violence because of his biology, because of the stress, because of the council. I always swore I would be different. I dedicated my entire life to medicine, to understanding the body, so I could have absolute control over mine. And yet, tonight, I behaved exactly like him and it breaks my heart to see you like that.’’
The car smoothly decelerated, pulling up the cobblestone driveway of our villa.
The headlights swept across the dark glass of the entrance before the driver cut the engine.
The driver, a silent security guard, didn’t say a word as he pressed the button to unlock the doors.
The moment the doors clicked open, the cool, damp island air rushed into the vehicle.
I didn’t move immediately. I just sat there, staring at the leather seat in front of me, the weight of my family’s legacy pressing heavily on my shoulders.
"Let’s go inside," Miller said gently, releasing my hand only to open his door and step out into the quiet night.
I followed him out, my boots crunching softly on the wet gravel.
As we walked up the stone steps toward the grand double doors of our villa, the sheer size of the empty house felt suffocating.
The silence here was different from the silence at Gerald’s, it was the silence of a space where we had just violently broken our peace only hours before.
I didn’t know how to go about it and could only stare at him for a moment.
Then unable to keep it in anymore, I spoke up.
"I am sorry," I whispered again as we reached the porch, the words slipping out of me like an involuntary reflex. "I am sorry for running away. I left you bleeding on the floor while I ran into the dark like a coward when I should have checked if you were alright. I should have stayed to assess your injuries. I should have—"
Miller turned around suddenly, blocking the entrance to the door. He didn’t look angry; he just looked incredibly determined. He reached out, grabbing both of my shoulders with his warm hands, forcing me to stop pacing and look at him.
"Leo, look at me," Miller commanded, his voice firm but filled with an intense, raw affection. "I need you to listen to me very carefully. You are not a coward. You were in pain, you were terrified of what you thought you were becoming, and you panicked. I don’t care about the apology anymore. What I care about is making sure you understand that we are going to get through this. We are going to promise each other right now, right here, that nothing like this will ever happen again. No more running. No more hiding. We resolve everything together without wasting time and also make sure everything works out well. Do you promise me?"
I looked into his green eyes, my breathing trembling. "I promise, Miller. I promise I will never run away from you again. I will never hide my thoughts or my fears, no matter how irrational they are."
"Good," Miller murmured, his grip softening as his hands slid up to cup the sides of my neck, his thumbs resting against my jawline. "Because I am not going to let you go. No matter what we find out tomorrow, no matter what this Janis Enigma means for your body, we are doing this together. I don’t care what happens, but I will always make sure I stand by you and not let you become what you hate the most, leo. I will always be with you.’’