Heart of Crossroad. Temple.
With her hat pulled low, Junior hesitated outside Reina’s room.
She had heard Reina had just regained consciousness and came to see her.
Yet for some reason, she couldn’t muster the courage to enter.
Suddenly, the door to the room burst open, and Priestess Margarita came rushing out with a shriek.
"Ugh! Enough! What kind of thanks is this? Just stay still and leave when you’re better!"
"What’s so scary about offering to buy a meal as thanks? Come on, Saintess Margarita, Saintess! Seriously..."
Watching Margarita sprint down the corridor, Reina chuckled dryly.
She then turned her gaze to Junior and grinned.
"What’s up, little mage? Here to visit the sick?"
"Something like that... You look well."
"Thanks to the anesthesia. How can I be fine with a hole in my stomach? Magic helped a bit, but I’m far from stable."
Despite just waking up, Reina chatted energetically before turning back into her room.
Staggering a bit, she settled on the bed and patted it.
"Stop standing there awkwardly and come in! Tell me what happened while I was out."
That’s what Junior intended to do, so she stepped forward.
But then.
She stopped at the threshold.
"...?"
Reina gave her a puzzled look. Yet, Junior remained silent, looking down.
-’As a survivor of the magic bombing from Camila Kingdom. Why do you care about her?’
The question Camus had posed during the ambush haunted her.
The sounds of the storm and lightning from 15 years ago echoed in her ears. Junior found it impossible to approach Reina any further.
"...I see. Is that it?"
Seeing Junior’s state, Reina quickly caught on and sighed.
"Maybe this distance between us is what’s right. The Jupiter’s daughter. It’s a miracle we even got this close."
"..."
"There are gaps that no matter how hard we try, can’t be bridged. We’ve managed to ignore it for so long, but it seems we’ve reached a limit now."
Junior clenched both of her fists – her intact right hand and the one scarred from the magic bombing.
"I have one question... Do you regret what happened that day?"
"What exactly are you referring to? I’ve done a lot."
"You annihilated my country, burned down my village."
Junior’s face was hidden beneath the brim of her hat as she asked in a suppressed voice, "Do you... regret it?"
Reina responded immediately.
"No."
"...!"
"I have never regretted any action I’ve taken as a soldier."
Reina’s voice was cold and functional.
"If I regretted, then what would that make of the subordinates who acted on my orders?"
"..."
"I was the commander of the magic corps. I ordered the killing of people, the burning of villages, the conquering of countries, and lost many soldiers in the process. If I were to feel comfortable with my regrets and seek redemption, then what would that make of the sacrifices of my subordinates?"
"..."
“I was a soldier, Junior. If it were an order from above, I’d do worse to your village than what I did. And I won’t regret it until I draw my last breath, and I can’t afford to regret it.”
Junior, clenching her teeth, hesitantly asked.
“So, if you were ordered to kill me, would you?”
“...Such an order won’t come.”
“And if it does?”
“...”
Reina let out a long sigh.
“Yes.”
She answered.
“If that’s the order, then I must.”
“...!”
Junior’s face paled, and Reina coldly spat out,
“I’m not like your mother. If it were Jupiter, she’d defy such orders, rebel, and run away holding you. She actually did that. But I can’t.”
Throughout the decades they served together, Reina admired Jupiter. She wanted to live like Jupiter.
Because she couldn’t live that way herself.
“To be frank, Junior, I can’t live like your mother.”
“Then why—”
Junior’s voice intensified.
“Why were you kind to me? If you don’t regret that day, and don’t even want to apologize!”
“...”
“Why did you try to befriend me? Why did you treat my injuries? Why?”
Reina, who had remained silent, lowered her gaze.
“I was tired. Tired of destroying and breaking things. I thought maybe, if I tried to protect and save something like your mother did, things might change.”
Both Junior and Reina recalled the image of Jupiter.
The jovially smiling face with white lightning-like hair...
Reina’s head slowly dropped.
“But now, I understand. I can’t be like that. I can’t be like Jupiter, who I can neither regret nor apologize to.”
“...”
“There’s a gap between us that can’t be bridged any further.”
While Junior remained standing at the entrance of the hospital room, Reina, seated on the bed, looked at her with a bitter gaze.
Junior murmured in a tear-filled voice,
“I wanted to forgive you.”
Reina chuckled with a dry tone.
“...If I could, I would have wanted to be your new mother. Or something like that.”
Junior’s face looked on the verge of tears. Reina slowly turned away.
“But I guess it wasn’t meant to be.”
***
Downtown Crossroad. Prison.
“...”
Junior stood blankly in front of Camus’s cell.
She had received visiting permission from Ash. But the thought of having a one-on-one conversation with Camus was daunting.
Above all, she didn’t know what they should talk about.
The Empire. Camila Kingdom. Revenge. Forgiveness...
There were many topics, but she couldn’t piece them together.
Junior didn’t even know how to start the conversation with Camus.
She didn’t know why she came here or what answer she hoped to receive.
“Hey.”
Then, a hoarse voice emerged from inside the cell.
“How long are you just going to stand there?”
“Wha-!”
Startled, Junior looked up to see Camus near the cell bars.
Although his face was swollen from being beaten, the cold and gloomy glint in his eyes remained unchanged.
"Having you stare at me like that is unsettling. Do you have business with me?"
"I’m sorry... I just..."
Recognizing the hesitating Junior, Camus’s voice softened.
"You’re that mage from before. From Camila Kingdom, wasn’t it?"
"..."
As Junior nervously bit her lip, Camus slowly took a seat next to the window bars.
"It seems you have something to say. Speak, I’m listening."
"Excuse me?"
"As you mentioned before, we hail from the same place, don’t we?"
Camus shrugged.
"You have such a troubled face. Speak freely."
For a moment, Junior seemed lost in thought but soon began recounting her tale disjointedly.
The magic bombing she experienced when she was seven. The family she lost. Jupiter who took her in. Her life for the past 15 years.
Events after joining the front lines here. Jupiter’s death. Meeting Reina. Getting close to Reina...
And after Camus had stabbed Reina, how everything became unclear to her.
Whether she belonged to the Empire or Camila Kingdom, whether she should forgive Reina or seek vengeance... she just didn’t know.
Listening intently to Junior’s outpouring, Camus slowly inquired, "How old are you now?"
"Twenty-two...sir."
"Quite young. If my second son were alive, he would’ve been around your age."
Camus chuckled lightly.
"I’m fifty-three. There’s a gap of over 30 years between us."
"30 years..."
"I lost my country and my wife and children when I was thirty-eight. Everything I had built up to that point was reduced to ashes. My hatred runs as deep as the thirty-eight years I lost."
For a moment, a distant look crossed Camus’s eyes.
Perhaps he was thinking of his lost family? Junior couldn’t tell.
"In the 15 years following, I battled to reclaim my country and failed. Essentially, the Empire stole my entire life."
Camus nodded toward Junior.
"But you’re different. You lived as a citizen of Camila Kingdom for 7 years and as one of the Empire for 15 years."
"..."
"You’ve lived longer as part of the Empire. Our eras, the depths of our hatreds, they’re different. It’s not odd for you to feel more allegiance to the Empire than to the Camila Kingdom."
Junior clenched her fists. Camus continued.
"I have no intention of blaming you for assimilating into the Empire. Don’t feel guilty about the life you’ve led within the Empire."
"..."
"Likewise, don’t be too hard on me for not forgetting my vengeance even after 15 years and still wanting to repay blood with blood. People have wounds in their hearts that can’t be healed."
What Camus was saying was similar to what Reina had told her.
Softly, Junior muttered, "Unhealable... wounds..."
"All we’ve done is survived. Each in our own way, unavoidably."
"..."
"We just survived, unavoidably."
That phrase felt too painful yet so accurate that it made Junior’s heart ache.
"What should I do from now on?"
After some contemplation, Camus opened his mouth.
"Forgive if you wish to forgive. Seek vengeance if that’s your desire. If you can’t choose between the two, that’s fine as well. Ponder on it. Until you find the answer you seek."
"..."
"Just don’t forget. Everything you’ve been through."
Camus’s scarred hand grasped the iron bars. He murmured in a low growl, "Never forget that a man like me existed."
"..."
"Do not forget the Camila Kingdom. It’s the burden we, the survivors, have to bear."
Camus released his grip on the bars, stood up, and retreated deeper into the prison cell.
"I’ll be executed soon. It’s best not to associate too much with a wicked criminal."
As he disappeared into the shadows, Junior watched him from a distance.
***
Upon exiting the prison, Ash was waiting.
"Junior."
"Prince."
Ash, seeing Junior’s somewhat awkward greeting, smiled warmly and gestured towards his mansion.
"There’s a defense strategy meeting tonight."
"Oh..."
"It’s a call-up, Jupiter Junior. Return to the main party."
Clutching her staff tightly, Junior nodded enthusiastically.
"Yes."
"How’s your condition?"
"Most of my injuries have healed. No need to worry."
Ash glanced back into the prison.
"Seems your inner turmoil hasn’t quite settled, has it?"
"...Yes."
Junior shook her head side to side, lightly slapped her cheeks, and looked directly at Ash.
"But these monsters aren’t here to listen to my woes. I’ll set my worries aside for now and return to the front lines."
Ash, taken aback by Junior’s words, was about to say something but chose to remain silent. He then motioned towards the waiting carriage.
"You know I always have a delicious meal prepared during our defense meetings, right? Let’s go. They say you should eat meat when you’re feeling down."
Junior didn’t quite catch the jest, but she felt the warmth in Ash’s gesture.
Climbing into the carriage, Junior thought to herself: She didn’t know the life she’d lead in the future. Whether she’d forgive Rayna, or forget Camus, the future remained a mystery. But she was a magician employed at the monster front. To continue this inner battle, she first needed to defeat the monsters looming before her.
"Prince."
"Hmm?"
"After we’ve swiftly dealt with these monsters," Junior flashed a cheeky grin at Ash, "Let’s share our troubles with each other all night."
"..."
"I want to hear about your worries too."
Ash chuckled softly and nodded.
"Sure. Anytime."
--TL Notes--
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