Season 4: Chapter 185. Working Holiday (5)
The Knights arrived at Paprika first.
Radish Servant stepped forward boldly. “A-hem. We have come to negotiate trade with Paprika!”
Despite arriving with a full army, he mentioned negotiation. On top of the village wall, Orange also sensed something was off.
‘Damn... but still...’
Without the power to refuse, Orange asked the only question that mattered. “D-Do you have food?”
“Yes. How about this? You mine ore for us, and we trade food to you in return?”
The pause was short.
“Agreed!”
“Huh?” Even Radish Servant blinked, surprised at how easily the gate began to open.
“I mean... we brought tents and beds, ready for a long war...”
The Order had prepared for months of siege, built respawn tents, stocked ammo, and sharpened their weapons... All for nothing.
“We’ll just use that when we establish the Working Holiday Colonial Office later. For now, let’s enter.” Almond stepped forward, unbothered.
Radish Servant flinched. “W-Wait, it could be a trap!”
He sensed something unnatural.
“Cannon fodder first!”
Clack!
He pushed Onion Worker and the others to the front.
“You go in first!”
“Y-Yes, sir!”
— HAHAHAHAHA
— sent them like disposable units lol
— honestly, fair procedure
— peak realism
Onion Worker entered first. Nothing happened. In fact, the guards above began yelling.
“Why are you so slow!? We need food!”
Radish Servant frowned. Eventually, they all entered. There were no traps and no resistance. Paprika had given up completely.
[Hunger]
This status effect hovered permanently over their eyes. They had lost the will to fight. Thus, the Knights waltzed into Paprika effortlessly.
— too easy lmao
— they just walked in like a guest pass
— it really is a working holiday
Shrimp, leader of Team Rocket, stepped out to greet them. “It’s been a while, my lord.”
Almond dismounted with an oddly respectful nod. “Yes, Captain.”
— why does this feel like historical drama?
— Giovanni vibes
— weren’t they literally enemies yesterday??
“We’d like to discuss how the Working Holiday contract will be structured. Please, come inside.” Shrimp politely held the gate open.
Almond didn’t step any further. “Shrimp.”
“Yes?”
Almond bowed his head slightly with a shadow covering his eyes.
No way... he wouldn’t...
He would. Because he was Almond.
Shing!
“This is the true form of our Working Holiday.”
Adamantium steel flashed from its sheath. The entire Order unsheathed their swords with a ringing chorus.
Shraaang!
“Clear civilians! BACK!!” the Knights shouted as they drove villagers away.
“Drop everything except pickaxes and cloth gear. Now!” Maid Black Tea barked alongside them, menacing and loud.
— holy shit
— this is just colonialism
— Spain speedrunning
— humanity’s most ancient tradition...
“W-What is this!? I thought we were exchanging ore for food!” Shrimp roared back, furious.
Almond shook his head. “We will trade, but the power gap is too large for equal exchange.”
— isn’t the weaker side supposed to say that
— loool the shamelessness
— I’m crying
“Working Holiday, you said!? Was that a lie!?” Orange screamed beside him.
“Ah... Working and Holiday are separate.” At Almond’s signal, a Knight presented two scrolls.
One was labeled Holiday for the Knights, and the other was labeled Working for Paprika.
“The full name is technically ‘Working & Holiday.’”
— so they work while Cheese rests
— this is just setting up a colony
— STOP EXPLAINING IT LMAO
— Almond is too proud of the name
— he likes his wordplay too much
“Nice, isn’t it?”
“What...?” Shrimp stared, speechless.
He had known, deep down. Even if Paprika was home ground, they didn’t have enough strength. The Cheese forces were well-fed, well-armed, and prepared.
[Hunger]
Meanwhile, they were starving. Too weak to mine Adamantium, too weak to fight, and too weak to resist.
“So, set down everything but your pickaxes.”
Thud.
Shrimp’s armor hit the ground.
— Paprika sovereignty gone...
— forced treaty arc
— nation lost vibes smh
— Shrimp, the fallen hero...
“S-So long as we’re given food... You won’t starve us, right?”
“Mind your manners when addressing the Lord, Miner!”
Whack!
Potato Servant’s kick sent Shrimp collapsing to his knees.
“Ghk!”
— holy shit lmaoooo
— disciplinary mode ON
— Potato Servant has no mercy
— ‘bro, it’s me’ is not working today
Shrimp looked up desperately. “M-My lord... please... food. Do not let our people starve!”
Almond nodded calmly. “You will receive it.”
“Hh... thank you...”
“In exchange, you will learn respect from experienced instructors.”
That last line sounded far too terrifying, but Shrimp had no choice.
“I... I understand...”
Whack!
Potato Servant kicked Shrimp again.
“Ugh! W-Why!? What did I do!?”
Potato Servant turned to Almond first, bowing deeply. “I will train this one properly before returning him.”
“Good. Then, let’s proceed with the rest.” Almond marched off with the Knights, leaving only Potato Servant and Shrimp behind.
The training began immediately.
“You rank below even Lackeys and Workers. Your class is Scrub, meaning you show even greater respect to the Lord.”
— What a Scrub!
— bro got demoted below Lackey and Worker
— SCRUB!
— this naming system is unhinged
“S-Scrub? You mean we’re not Knights, but...”
“Silence, Scrub Shrimp.”
Thwack!
Shrimp took another blow.
— Scrub Shrimp HAHAHA
— they came prepared with titles, I swear
— Scrub-tier citizens
“When you responded to the Lord earlier, you should’ve shown Scrub-level courtesy.”
Shrimp stared, bewildered.
‘How much more respectful can one human be?’
He used honorifics already!
“H-How should I speak then? I did use formal address...”
“Repeat after me.”
“Yes.”
“Ohhhhh~ My loooord~”
“...”
“Well?”
— I’M DYING
— he really wants vibrato in his speech
— protocol GOAT
— Note-taking this for corporate career growth
“Ohhhh~ OoO~ My~ lord~”
“The Lord does not like excessive vibration.”
“Ah.”
“Cut clean on the downward tone.”
“Oooohh~ My lord!”
“Yes. Now we’re getting there.”
— Producer Potato Servant on vocal coaching
— recording a tribute album
— my ribs pls
“And when your rank is low, you end with, Sir.”
“But I’m already using honorifics?”
“Add sir after that. Observe a demonstration from a trained instructor.”
“???”
Shrimp didn’t understand until he heard it live.
“Ohhhh~ I am eternally grateful~! My loooord! Sir!”
“...”
— I CANNOT BREATHE
— Someone send him back to the military
— NPC dialogue looping
“Listen and repeat.”
He even repeated it twice, worried that Shrimp missed it.
“Ohhh~ I am eternally grateful~ My loooord! Sir!”
“Ohhh~ OooOOo~!”
“I said one bend only.”
Shing!
A blade flashed. Potato Servant suddenly turned dead serious.
“H-Hhh... Y-You’re pulling out a sword for this!?” Shrimp trembled.
This was no drill.
“You’re not bending at all.”
“Y-Yes, sir...”
“Again. One, two, three...”
“Ooooooh~”
The training continued for an hour.
— If no bend, full swing punishment incoming
— Peak military hazing arc
Meanwhile, on top of the wall, Almond surveyed Paprika from above.
‘Huh...’
Last time he rampaged through the region, he never observed it calmly. Plenty of land spread out, though useless without Fertile Soil.
‘Wait.’
Between the rocky fields, two silhouettes approached. It was Zelu and Choco Shroom.
***
At last, Zelu reached Paprika. He came with dreams, hopes, and vengeance only to see Cheese banners, Knights everywhere, and Almond standing proudly on top of the wall.
“Welcome to Working Holiday, recruit.”
— THIS IS PEAK IRONY
— Working Holiday mf
— I love this disaster
“Th-This... has to be a joke...”
However, Zelu had no choice. Without a bed here, death meant respawning in Cheese. A trap he couldn’t risk.
“Drop everything. Only pickaxes allowed. Proceed.”
Zelu and Choco Shroom submitted. Into Paprika they walked, clothed in thin rags and pickaxes in hand. The wind howled.
[Cold]
Winter cut through their fabric like knives.
“D-Damn... I-It’s c-cold! Knights, please! Baby Zelu is freezing! Goo goo ga ga~!”
— Only a baby when convenient
— someone warm the infant warrior pls
“It’s warm inside the mines.”
Kick!
A Knight shoved Zelu forward.
“Gkk!”
“Zelu!! You dare kick a child!? Hurt me instead! Kill me! Not him!!” Choco Shroom defended him dramatically.
“Hah. A traitor’s brat and widow. Still pathetic.”
Then, someone approached.
[Onion]
Onion Worker appeared, smirking like a cartoon villain. “You should thank the Lord. If it were me, you’d already be dead.” He leaned in close, dripping with venom and pure theater. “You’ve been granted the title, Scrub.”
“Eh?”
“Scrub is the lowest of the low. Beneath Lackeys and Workers, dirt-status.” He lifted Zelu by the collar and declared, “From now on, you are Scrub Zelu.”
“Urgh...”
“And she is Choco Scrub. Now, dig hard! If you want to live, work. HAHAHA!” Onion left laughing.
Zelu and Choco were handed off to the Workers, who were below Lackeys, yet somehow above Scrubs.
“This damn...” Zelu muttered as they shoved him into the mines.
Inside, the Paprika villagers huddled weakly together.
“Z-Zelo...!?”
“Zelo! You came to save us!?”
The old comrades were fooled by his face. Then, they saw his rags, pickaxe, and rank.
“Y-You got caught too?”
“No. I am Zelu, Zelo’s son.”
The shock struck them silent.
“W-What!?”
“Unbelievable.”
The son of Zelo looked at them: broken, starving, and obedient.
Finally, he snapped. “What did you DO to lose a country in days!? Even national traitors would’ve taken longer to sell out a nation!”
— THIS CHILD IS UNSAFE
— Kyahahaha
— His mouth has no safety catch
— Evil awakened mode
The grown adults bowed their heads before the boy.
“We must... revolt. Prepare to rise and take back freedom,” Zelu declared like a general and not a child.
They nodded slowly, sparking a hint of rebellion.
“As expected of Zelo’s blood... He carries the Will of Zel.”
“With him... maybe we can...”
Revolution brewed.
Clack.
Someone said from behind them, “Well, how’s the bonding going?”
The Lord had arrived.
Instantly, the entire mine echoed in perfect choir.
“Ohhh~~ OooooOoo~ My loooord!!”
“Ohhh~~ OooooOoo~ My loooord!!”
“Ohhh~~ OooooOoo~ My loooord!!”
“Ohhh~~ OooooOoo~ My loooord!!”
“Ohhh~~ OooooOoo~ My loooord!!”
Zelu froze. Their chant was identical in tone, vibrato, and pitch as if they were NPCs programmed with one line.
— THIS IS HORROR ACTUALLY
— cult hive mind unlocked
— rebellion who??
— they’re fully conditioned omg
‘Is rebellion even possible?’