Season 4: Chapter 142. Public Interview (1)
Before a wall of posters at the village square, the three leaders of the Union grinned at the latest edition.
[The Farmer’s Daily]
“The Knight Order’s stock will plummet.”
“They’re finished.”
“At last, the real culprit is exposed. Heh heh heh.”
Donuts, especially, couldn’t stop smiling. From the Potato Illusion incident to every humiliation he’d suffered, a single photo would avenge all of it.
“This is journalism! This is democracy!”
— LMAO true
— Union rise!
— Parliament takeover!
Ruling by gun and sword had limits. True domination came from the mind. And nothing was more powerful than the press to shape it. The Union had won the battle, or so they thought.
“Wait... is that Fertile Soil in the window?”
“Yeah. I checked myself. It’s real, and it’s huge.”
“That much Fertile Soil?”
“Told you.”
However, the people’s attention drifted to the wrong detail.
‘What the...?’
Instead of the collusion, they kept staring at the land like how everyone fixated on the suits or watches at a press conference.
“This is trash. Collusion, tsk tsk.”
All the while, their eyes lingered on the black earth.
‘It’s massive.’
‘They must be rich.’
The legendary All Black that every villager once longed for, a heaven of Fertile Soil, was real and right there in the photo. Some streamers were already priming their audiences.
“Collusion? Who cares. The one paying better wins.”
— LOL facts
— Exactly, what’s the big deal?
— Ah-Sung colluded with the media too, who cares
— Corporate PR isn’t a crime
“They say the knights give out full iron sets while the Union makes you share and pay. Why join them?”
— True, the Union is like a Union society, not a job
— Go Knight Order lol
— Even The Bubble Daily is theirs, why refuse?
Donuts’s eyes flickered.
‘Wait... this is backfiring?’
Instead of discrediting them, The Farmer’s Daily had just advertised the Knight Order’s wealth and power.
Ding.
[NorthFace has donated 20,000 won.]
[Showing the South’s wealth to the North’s people? Tsk tsk.]
— HAHAHAHA dead accurate
— The difference is obvious in the pics
— East vs West Germany vibes
— Even in games, communism fails lol
***
Two hours later, a sea of massive heads appeared at the Knight Order’s hall.
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!”
The roar struck Black Tea’s ears as she stumbled outside.
‘What is going on?!’
Her eyes widened at the endless crowd.
— OMG
— Insane turnout
— What’s happening??
Just earlier, they had feared that the interviews would be a total no-show.
“Fertile Soil! Fertile Soil!”
“Farmer King! Almon D. Roger!!”
“Long live the corporation!”
Tears welled up in Black Tea’s eyes. “Th-Thank goodness...”
— Is she crying??
— LOL
— She’s Knight Order to the bone
— Black Tea, don’t cry!!
“I-I’m not crying!”
— She is crying hahaha
— Let it out lol
— She cries so easily
It was only a game and not a real job interview, yet Black Tea had secretly worried that she had doomed the Knight Order. The conflict had escalated since she switched sides. The spies and smear campaigns... she had feared that it was all her fault. This scene outside proved otherwise.
Still, not all was well as the Knight Order gathered.
“There are too many. What do we do?”
“Exactly. Our planned trial will take forever.”
From fearing no one would come, they now feared that too many had arrived.
“Hmm.” Almond thought to himself.
They couldn’t turn the crowd away.
“We’ll change the first test.”
“You mean, before the arena?”
“Yeah, let’s go with something simple. Potato Servant, you handle the crowd.”
“Crowd control, sir? Leave it to me!” Potato Servant grinned, delighted with the task.
***
A short while later at the interview site, Potato Servant stepped up onto the platform. The way he carried himself with sunglasses already set him apart.
“Hah. Unbelievable, these recruits are a mess.”
In the Knight Order, only Potato Servant had served in the military. Not just that, he had been a drill sergeant.
— Potato Servant, lol
— Reliable! The drill sergeant is here!
— Company commander vibes, hahaha
— Those sunglasses are triggering my PTSD, fr
— So Potato Servant has been going easy on Black Tea and Lemon all along, lol
“Hey, you bastards!!” He suddenly barked at the applicants. “Line up straight!”
The crowd murmured in confusion. They still hadn’t figured out the mood.
Then, Maid Black Tea and Servant Lemon appeared. One by one, they began kicking the ones sticking out of line.
Thud.
“Stand in line properly!”
“Recruit number twenty-three! Are you out of your mind!? Line up straight!”
— Lmaoooo
— Servant Lemon, hahahaha
— What is this? lol
Potato Servant called out, “You recruits. Did you think this was just some regular company, huh?”
He was met with silence.
“No answer!?”
“N-No, sir!!”
The recruits quickly replied this time.
‘We’re screwed.’
‘What is happening?’
‘Why... why am I reenlisting...?’
They already sensed that they had walked into the wrong place. Even then, Maid Black Tea and Servant Lemon kept kicking.
Thump. Thump.
“Stay in line!”
“Stay!”
Potato Servant adjusted his sunglasses. “Do you want to join the Order?”
At this point, hesitation would’ve been natural. However, everyone shouted in unison before the Fertile Soil.
“Yes!”
“That’s the loudest you can get!?”
“Yes, sir!!!”
Potato Servant finally nodded. “So, you can shout loudly, huh? Why wait until I have to tell you?”
— This combo is insane, lol
— Beautiful
— This is the true Order
— No way Almond, the non-vet, could ever pull this off, hahaha
— Damn, my blood pressure
— Glorious.
The residents had only come for an interview, yet somehow found themselves drafted. They were bewildered, but screamed their lungs out anyway for the sake of passing.
“No, sirrrrrrrr!!”
Potato Servant nodded once more. “Good. Now, let’s see who among you truly deserves Fertile Soil.”
From behind his sunglasses, his eyes swept over the recruits. Everyone looked tense.
“Plenty of you didn’t even apply. You just showed up, right?”
“Y-Yes, sir...”
The voices trailed off.
“Answer louder!!”
“Yes, sirrrr!!”
Their reply boomed.
“The company commander is disappointed in you.”
Potato Servant claimed to be disappointed.
— ?
— Since when was he company commander? lol
— God, this is too funny
— Lmaooo
— Been waiting for that line
— Hahaha
“You all knew you had to apply, yet none of you did. Only now, when the Order looks good, you slink in here hoping for a chance!?”
— For real lol it is annoying
— So petty, haha
— Potato Servant drops the truth bomb again
“Our Lord Almond values procedure above all else. Those who came here without applying? Immediate rejection, but...”
Potato Servant let his words hang.
Gulp.
Everyone held their breath. Like any seasoned drill sergeant, he knew how to make a single declaration rise and fall. That way, everyone listened.
“This time only! Because it’s the first interview! Out of mercy, we’ll grant all of you a chance!”
Shhhk!
He yanked down a hidden tarp, revealing bold letters.
[Knight Order Open Recruitment]
“Behold! The official public recruitment exam of the Knight Order!”
The crowd erupted. “Woooooaaaahhh!!”
— Are you kidding me? lol
— This is literally a corporate giant
— A public exam, seriously?!
— Righting the wrongs of failing civil service here, hahaha
The recruitment rules were as followed.
“First, round one. Right here, in this very line, you will take the no-question self-introduction exam.”
Round one began as the residents remained in line while the Order members walked around.
“We don’t have time to question everyone. Just start your self-introduction when you reach the front.”
— Oh my god, lol
— Round one is a no-beat rap cypher
— Self-intro with no prompts, hahaha
“If your self-introduction pleases the examiner, you will receive this necklace!”
Clink.
The pure iron necklace looked heavy and resembled a chain more than jewelry.
— Holy shit, lol
— That’s clearly a dog collar
— Is this a rap audition?
— A ‘pass necklace,’ I’m dead
— Might as well engrave ‘Beware of Dog’ on it.
— They actually brought chains, hahaha
It looked like a dog collar, but those desperate to enter the Order treated it like gold and diamonds.
“Yeeaaahhh!!”
“Let’s gooo!!”
After all, they were Fertile Soil dogs.
***
The interviewers for round one were Almond, Radish Servant, Potato Servant, and Maid Black Tea. Servant Lemon took on the role of MC.
“Hohoho?! Another one eliminated already~ The Order isn’t easy, huh?!”
She even interviewed candidates who seemed noteworthy enough to stir buzz with the admins.
“Man, I was cut in three seconds flat. Never again.”
“Fucking Nutillion! Fuuuck!!”
Some applicants became furious, especially at Almond.
— Nutillion, lmao
— The concept is killing me.
— Everyone’s personalities are flipping, hahaha
Most interviewers at least let people finish their introductions, but not Almond.
“Next.” He cut them off without hesitation.
“Hello, let me introduce myself. My name is Kim Forty, occupation, Traveler...”
“Thank you.”
“Wha—!?”
“Next.”
“W-Why!? I had a whole monologue lined up!”
“We don’t hire interns in their forties.”
“B-But my monologue...”
It was a classic Ah-Sung-style interview.
— Thought he cut him for acting cocky, but nope, just for being forty, lmao
— Cold as ice, hahaha
— His name was just Kim Forty...
— Oh my god
— Too damn reasonable though
— No one beats age.
— Bye, buddy.
— Brutal
— Bubblegum is weeping, hahaha
Almond adjusted his sunglasses and moved on. “Next.”
“G-Good day! I, I’ve been streaming on Treevy for three years now...”
“Thank you.”
“Uh... wh-why!?”
“No real-life mentions allowed.”
“...”
“Next.”
Anyone facing Almond had to be on their absolute best behavior.
— The reasoning is too solid, lol
— No kidding.
— ??? Bang!
— Only in-game identity matters in Cheese Village.
— His speed is insane, but the logic is airtight.
— Now this is an interview.
And next in line...
‘D-Dammit, of all people... Almond himself...’
This person trembled more than most.
[ForeverAlone]