"Just now, did it go 'bang bang' twice in the room?"
Ah Qing's face went blank. She glanced at the door the little fox had just closed, then at Lin Bingyun, who was standing calmly at the stairwell entrance, and asked, her cute mouth making two onomatopoeic "objects colliding" sounds as she spoke.
"Yes, there were two bangs just now. Master Fuli is negotiating with the two Spirit Beasts. One bang per beast." Lin Bingyun nodded lightly, agreeing with Ah Qing's assessment.
At Master Fuli's speed, coming in the door, grabbing the metal-based lamp by the entrance, whipping the pole once to smack the silkworm moth flat on the floor, then bringing it down from above to chop the Merino sheep on the head—he could easily do all that within a second.
"?"
Ah Qing's eyes gradually widened. She spun around and started pounding furiously on the purple-copper armored door, shouting into the apartment:
"Stop fighting, all of you! We can talk this out. We already know what you've been through, we're here to help you..."
"This time the villagers are bad, the baa is a good baa!"
With no clear concept of the golden brand name that was "Master Fuli," Ah Qing was frantic, terrified the little fox would get the worst of it in the melee, and wanted to rush in to break up the fight.
Under Ah Qing's little fists, the 3-millimeter-thick outer purple-copper panel gradually dented in.
Even the composite steel frame inside started making faint "zz-zz" snapping sounds as it broke.
"Uh..."
Noticing the changes in the purple-copper door, even the ever-calm and confident Lin Bingyun couldn't help showing a trace of hesitation as she watched the slowly deforming composite armor door.
Sure, in the eyes of anyone truly determined, civilian-grade doors basically amount to another form of a "gentleman's agreement."
But denting the surface copper panel with just a few punches, and tearing off the welded anchor points inside that hold the copper plate—this was a bit much.
"He's coming, he's coming..."
Hearing the "boom boom boom" from the pounding on the door, Ansheng answered from inside and reopened the door that had been shut.
"Xiaolan, you're not hurt, right?"
Ah Qing grabbed the little fox's hand, lifted him up, and carefully checked him all over for injuries.
While she was examining him, Ah Qing also swept a look over the scene inside the apartment.
The silkworm moth, easily the size of a gas stove, was lying peacefully on the floor, legs limp, with a huge lump bulging on its head.
As for the sheep that had previously been rampaging in the living room, it was now in a right-triangle pose—hind legs stretched straight, butt on the floor, front hooves tippy-toeing on the ground, with a fishing lamp embedded on its head, golden stars spinning in its eyes, even its lips trembling.
"Baa?"
Ah Qing looked utterly stunned. She glanced at the little fox, then at the Merino sheep, waved a hand in front of its eyes, and greeted it:
"Baa—"
The Merino sheep shuddered all over, let out a tragic, shrill scream, and scrambled away, rolling as it went, crashing into the sofa. It flipped the six-meter crescent sofa over and used it as a blanket to cover itself, leaving only a shivering butt exposed.
"......."
Ah Qing was at a loss for words, not knowing how to explain her complicated feelings to the little fox right now.
"We Spirit Beasts are all like this..."
"At first meeting, both sides are all 'with the sun and moon in my grasp, and the stars within reach, there's no one like me in this world.' That arrogant, overbearing aura is like a rocket engine. But if it actually comes to blows, it's instantly, 'I'm already behaving, please let me go.'"
Ansheng chuckled, lifted his head, and poked Ah Qing's cheek with his little fox snout.
That's just how Spirit Beasts are.
The winner just has to enjoy everything on the turf, while the loser has a lot more to think about.
"Clean up a space. Move the table and chairs from the tea room out here for temporary use..."
Lin Bingyun led the nanny squad inside and began clearing the area in an orderly fashion, instructing the servants to use flat mops to push all the gravel and furniture debris on the floor over to the balcony corner, using the wall there as a temporary barrier.
After mopping the floor three times and wiping it once with cloths to ensure the area was clean and tidy, they moved the tea room table and chairs out to temporarily serve as a meeting and negotiation table for Master Fuli.
Lin Bingyun went into the kitchen, silently stared at the now-empty spot where the fridge used to be, and said, "Go buy two cases of bottled water from the supermarket downstairs, and while you're at it, get some seasonal fruit and make a fruit platter."
There used to be two large fridges here, one for storing fresh fruits and vegetables, and the other for assorted famous spring waters from all over, used for brewing tea for Master Fuli.
Both fridges had been launched out the window by the Merino sheep's charges and had crashed downstairs.
"All right, talk. What exactly did you come to my house to pull?"
Ansheng sat at the tea table, took a sip of cola he had brought from the study, and slanted a look at the two Spirit Beasts wearing thoroughly honest expressions as he asked.
"Baa..."
The Merino sheep, its wool entirely greyed out, responded to Master Fuli's questioning in a pitiful, aggrieved tone.
The story it told wasn't much different from what Lin Bingyun had later gathered via phone calls.
It was just a lot more detailed in the specifics.
Because Weaving Village was flooded with orders, they went crazy plucking wool, even pulling the newborn lambs' first fleece. Completely enraged, the Merino sheep started the rebellion and strike by shoving the village chief's head into the cesspit.
The silkworm moth's reason for rebelling was even simpler.
Spring silkworms spin silk, humans collect it, and when the silkworm becomes a moth and lays its eggs, its life cycle is complete.
But this silkworm moth was just too big. It wouldn't spin silk or lay eggs, only kept stuffing its face, so the villagers sprayed it with insecticide.
The two of them teamed up, overturned the village, hid in a dust-proof cabinet, and were air-shipped to Master Fuli's home.
Right now, there was a peacock guarding the village—the one that had never seen its own tail feathers.
It was probably still busy kicking the villagers' butts.
"Foxshit!"
Ansheng already knew the whole story, but he still patiently listened to the Merino sheep's explanation. Then he slapped his paw on the table and feigned anger:
"You go live it up in debauchery and don't invite me, and now when the livestock get oppressed it's all my fault, yeah? Was it me, knife in paw, holding it to the villagers' throats and forcing them to churn out goods?"
"Look at my Ah Qing here. The static from that fully polyester outfit of hers has me crackling and popping all over!"
"She can't even guarantee her underwear is pure cotton..."
"Uh?" Ah Qing looked dumbfounded. She instinctively glanced at her clothes, a hint of embarrassment showing.
Come to think of it... ever since winter started, she really had been zapping the little fox with static until he crackled all over.
"Baa..."
The Merino sheep looked unconvinced. It stretched out a hoof and moved a bit closer to Ah Qing, poking her down jacket. A sharp "pop" of static rang out, and it jerked its hoof back in fright.
"Baa..." The Merino sheep cradled its hoof, scooted its butt away with a disgusted look, terrified of getting zapped by Ah Qing again.
It wasn't that it hurt much—it was just scary as hell for a sheep.
"So... the crappy treatment in Weaving Village cannot be pinned on us. If you're gonna blame someone, you can only blame those greedy assholes in the village, got it?"
Ansheng patiently broke it down for them, earnestly teaching the two dopey Spirit Beasts how to fight for their rights.
Once they got back to Weaving Village, regardless of anything else, the first step would be to call the Security Bureau and file a report.
Blow the whistle on the villagers for abusing a 'strategic national resource,' then notify fire services, tax authority, market supervision, and the forest bureau to come and run the full process.
String that silky little combo together, and the villagers would be calling it "Grandpa Baa is fierce as hell" as they dialed the cops themselves without another word.
"When you go back, grab a phone. Anytime something makes you unhappy, call the Security Bureau and say the villagers have made you completely lose the will to reproduce."
"Baa?"
The Merino sheep looked half doubtful, but given how hard Master Fuli could punch and how much he knew, it still picked up a phone and called the Security Bureau.
"Hello, this is the National Security Bureau. Do you have a report or tip you'd like to provide?"
"Baa! Baa baa baa..."
There was a moment of silence on the other end. "Understood. Transferring you to a specialist line now..."
After a series of beeps, the call was transferred to another channel, and a soft, woolly "baa" came through the line.
Hearing this, the Merino sheep's eyes went wide. It hurriedly started "baa-ing" at the sheep on the other end of the call.
Holy shit! There really was another Spirit Beast sheep answering its emergency call!
"Xiaolan..."
Ah Qing, looking very cautious, poked the little fox on the shoulder and whispered, "Does this count as inciting a crime?"
The little fox's reasoning sounded very solid, but Ah Qing still felt something was a bit off.
Inciting a sheep to beat up the villagers and all that...
With the Security Bureau stepping in, the issue of Weaving Village exploiting Spirit Beasts should be resolved.