Chapter 3: Regression (2)
Lancia Jintia.
My connection with her had begun from the most trivial and ordinary of circumstances.
No, in truth, even calling it a connection felt embarrassing.
It was merely that, during a regular service at the cathedral, we had happened to pass by each other and learn each other’s faces.
That was our very first meeting.
Hair the pale blue of clear gemstones, sparkling as if catching the light, and a refined appearance.
Perhaps because she was a Holy Knight cadet, she drew people’s attention in many ways.
Unfortunately, it was attention in the worst sense.
An orphan of common birth, left in the care of the cathedral after losing her family.
And yet, ‘not knowing her place,’ she always acted with effort and dignity, which quickly made her the target of malicious mockery and scorn.
Even so, she paid it no mind, simply carrying out her duties in silence.
With her beauty, diligence, piety, and chivalry toward the weak, she was a model student for others to follow.
But unfortunately, she had no talent—her swordsmanship was poor, and her divine power was pitifully weak.
That was the world’s evaluation of her.
‘…Though in truth, it was all just an act.’
Why she so thoroughly hid her real strength and abilities…
Why she went out of her way to make herself seem incompetent and frail…
That, I never learned in detail.
“……”
Was it because of the Princess Velita I saw yesterday?
Seeing her, much like the princess, hiding her true self, I couldn’t help but feel uneasy.
Perhaps I should make an excuse and leave this place.
That thought crossed my mind, but I gave a small shake of my head.
‘…No, she’s… a little different.’
I carefully pulled out an old memory that had been tucked away in a corner of my mind.
It was the fact that she was one of the very few who had helped me.
Even though that memory was from long ago, it remained vivid.
— Lian of House Gwendil. I have come for your head.
Yes… that was what she had said.
Was it when I was defeating the pursuers and healing my wounds?
She had appeared suddenly, like the wind.
Even wearing armor, she made not a single sound, and I had instinctively reached for my weapon.
But she had stared straight at me, not batting an eye, and spoken.
— Your wound is deep. Do you not wish to finish treating it?
To my sarcastic remark about whether she would just wait until I finished healing, she replied in an indifferent voice.
— That is a strange question.
— I do not mean to belittle you, but even if you were in perfect condition, escaping from me here and now would be impossible.
— Because I am stronger than you.
I did not deny her words.
Instead, I used my divine power to heal the worst of my wounds, and she, watching me intently, sheathed her sword without hesitation.
— I shall amend my earlier statement, Lian of House Gwendil.
— I have no right to take your life.
— I came here under the pretext of executing you after being told that you were a heretic priest and a worshipper of a heathen god.
— But you have just used the miracle of healing before my eyes. And I can sense, faint though it is, unmistakable divine power from you. A worshipper of an evil god could never wield Ilionel’s authority. Therefore, you are not a worshipper of an evil god.
She had even reached out her hand to heal the wounds I had not yet managed to treat, using the miracle of healing.
— I do not obey the Emperor’s orders. The only one who may command me is the Almighty Ilionel. And He has only granted permission to raise my blade against heretics and evil demons.
— Therefore, I have neither reason nor right to kill you.
— Nor do I have the right to condemn the result of a battle where both sides stake their lives, their causes, and their convictions.
After sweeping her eyes with pity over the corpses scattered around us, she turned her gaze back to me.
Amber eyes, like a wheat field awaiting harvest in the fall.
Those amber eyes looked at my collarbone—
And clearly captured the strange brand revealed through the torn fabric.
…But even after seeing the brand, she said nothing.
She simply finished healing me, then turned away without hesitation.
— I wish you luck, Lian Gwendil.
— And may the Almighty and Merciful Ilionel’s blessing be with you as well.
That had been my last encounter with her.
And then…
“Uuh, um…”
“Ah, yes.”
At the cautious voice calling me, I finally snapped out of my thoughts.
Lancia Jintia was looking this way with a rather dejected expression.
She quietly handed me a book and asked,
“Did I… step in for nothing?”
“No, not at all. Thank you.”
Quickly taking the book she handed over, I was finally able to look at her closely, now that she seemed relieved enough to offer a small smile.
…Indeed, just like the princess, she looked much younger than I remembered.
Her eyes trembled faintly with unease, and the corners of her lips quivered.
Seeing her so obviously gauging my reaction, I bowed politely in gratitude.
“Thank you for helping me. I was in a difficult spot, but you saved me, senior.”
“Ah.”
She, too, bowed politely in return.
Flustered and unsure what to do, she fumbled in her movements.
I wondered if she was truly the same person I remembered, but recalling the princess, I simply let the thought pass.
She, too, was likely acting.
“I’m Lian Gwendil. And you, senior…?”
“Ah, I’m Lancia Jintia. It’s a pleasure to meet you, junior.”
“So you’re Senior Lancia. Once again, thank you very much.”
“Oh, not at all. It wasn’t that difficult.”
Lancia Jintia waved her hand shyly.
“More than that, you’re quite diligent, junior. Coming to the library on the very first day.”
As she said this, she glanced over the titles of the stacked books.
Ancient Ruins and Relics.
The Origin of the Holy Sun Church.
The Splendid Legacy of the Past.
Nodding at the exceedingly dry titles, she asked,
“This may be a rude question, but… your dormitory?”
“Crooks.”
“I knew it! Just as I guessed.”
At my answer, she smiled brightly.
Though it was true for other dormitories as well, Crooks students were particularly famous for their strong sense of belonging and camaraderie.
It seemed she was no different.
“Oh, was that too materialistic a reaction?”
Looking slightly embarrassed, she handed me the library card while glancing at me.
“You just need to return it within two weeks. Um… if it’s overdue, I’ll be a little—no, a lot—troubled…”
“Yes, I’ll keep that in mind. I’ll be especially careful so you won’t have to worry.”
“All right, then I’ll trust you with it.”
She tucked her student ID away with a bright smile.
“So, junior, do you happen to have any plans after this?”
“Pardon?”
“If it’s all right with you, I thought I could show you around the cathedral or the academy.”
She quickly waved her hands as if to say not to misunderstand.
“Oh, um… I don’t mean anything strange! It’s just… one of Crooks dorm’s traditions is that second-years should guide new students around the academy.”
I was well aware of that tradition.
But the fact that the one offering was her made me hesitate.
“Unfortunately, I have something I need to do afterward.”
“Ah, I see…”
Seeing her look disappointed, I quietly swallowed a sigh of relief.
She wasn’t exactly someone I needed to avoid at all costs, but…
‘There’s no need to get involved, either.’
Above all, the biggest reason was that I had no idea how “the current her” would react if she noticed my secret.
There was no guarantee she would make the same choice as the her from the past.
Just as I was about to politely decline again—
Growl.
“……”
Her face flushed red as she shrank back.
I was watching her without much reaction when—
‘…Ah!’
Suddenly, the thought of an event coming up soon flashed in my mind.
And with that, I immediately changed my mind.
If my calculations were correct, it would be far more beneficial—despite the risk—to forge a connection with her.
“Senior.”
“Wh-what is it?”
“If it’s all right, would you like to go to the dining hall together?”
‘While I’m at it, I might as well repay a little of that past debt.’
That’s what I murmured inwardly as I smiled at her.
“Ugh, still, as a senior it’s a bit shameful to have a junior treat me.”
As we entered the academy dining hall, Lancia spoke as if embarrassed, and I gave her a small reassuring smile.
“Then think of it as a bribe so you’ll look kindly on me from now on.”
“Ah, that’s not good… How about instead I grant you a favor later?”
“What kind of favor are we talking about?”
“Hm… maybe I could be your sparring partner sometime?”
She replied playfully, then added with a wry smile,
“You’d probably be really surprised. Like, wow, there’s someone out there this bad… that kind of surprise.”
As she spoke, she subtly revealed the scabbard hanging out of sight at her side.
The Holy Sun Church had a doctrine that strictly forbade the use of bladed weapons like spears or swords, except in certain cases.
Because of that, hiding or concealing one’s weapon from public view had come to be seen as a kind of virtue.
“So you’re a Holy Knight cadet.”
“Yes, that’s right.”
She answered with a bitter smile.
“I’m always competing for last or second-to-last place. It was the same in first year, so I imagine second year won’t be much different.”
Her resigned expression was exactly that of a student discouraged by poor skill and terrible grades.
I gave her a suitably sympathetic response.
“To be honest, I’m pretty worried myself.”
“Huh? Don’t tell me you’re a Holy Knight cadet too, junior?”
“No, if you had to categorize me, I’m more on the theologian or priest side.”
I thought of my eldest brother, who had already graduated from the academy and was carrying on the family business.
And my second brother, whose skill had been great enough to join the Imperial Knights.
The thought brought a wry smile to my lips.
“I originally wanted to join Hilts or Wands since I was a child. But I came to Crooks in accordance with my father’s wishes.”
“You mean…”
“It’s been about half a year since I officially registered with the Holy Sun Church. Thanks to that, I’ve only just taken my first steps in related matters. I’m worried about whether I’ll be able to do well going forward.”
“Ah.”
She swallowed her words with a brief sigh before speaking again.
“It’s embarrassing for me to say this, but I’m sure you’ll do just fine, junior.”
“Yes, thank you. I’m sure you’ll do well too, senior.”
With that, our conversation ended, and we took our seats facing each other.
Though it was called the academy dining hall, it was no less than a high-class restaurant.
“Oh.”
Seeing the dishes placed before me, I couldn’t help but let out a sound of admiration.
Why on earth had my past self spent every day complaining that the food didn’t suit my tastes or my dignity?
‘I was just spoiled, that’s all.’
I immediately reached for my utensils—only to pause.
Across from me, Lancia was quietly and reverently reciting a prayer.
“……”
I quietly set my utensils down again, joining her in the prayer.
Or more accurately, just as I was about to clasp my hands together—
Thud.
Something flew through the air, hitting Lancia’s head and falling to the table.
It was a small piece of bread, torn up, soaked in water, and rolled into a ball with great care.
“……”
Lancia simply continued her prayer with her hands together, as if nothing had happened.
Following her lead, I pretended not to notice and clasped my hands as well.
Extending my senses slightly, I could hear snickering from not far away.
‘That annoying breathing… I know exactly who that is without even looking.’
He had been fairly well known in my previous life.
An upperclassman who boasted that he had entered Crooks because he had relatives in high positions, and that a lofty role had already been reserved for him.
If someone had a good background, he’d latch on and act close. If they didn’t, he’d harass them for no reason as they passed by.
In particular, he would harass hardworking students or those with good grades even more persistently.
‘Well, it was only natural when it came out that all that talk about high positions was a lie.’
He had clung to me, too, once I became a bit well-known, which is why I remembered him so clearly.
‘Given the circumstances, Lancia really is the perfect prey.’
Thud, thud.
Even while the prayer continued, two more bread balls came flying.
Some were aimed at me as well, but they missed and went astray.
I didn’t bother reacting.
“……”
Finally, after the short prayer ended, I could lift my bowed head.
Lancia still wore a gentle smile.
“Thank you for the meal, junior. If you ever need my help, just let me know. I’ll help you with everything I’ve got.”
“It’s just one meal at the dining hall, senior.”
“Even so. Being treated to a meal is a great kindness.”
“By that logic, the help you gave me at the library earlier is a far greater kindness.”
She was still smiling, but the corners of her lips trembled slightly with embarrassment, awkwardness, and an unspoken apology.
“…And I’m sorry. I ended up showing you something unpleasant on your very first day.”
“I think I understand the general situation, so you don’t need to apologize, senior.”
I shrugged as I spoke.
“There are always people like that in places like this. Didn’t Ilionel himself say it? In such cases, just smile and walk away. Don’t bother engaging with them.”
If anything, you handled it just as the teachings say, senior.
After saying that, I gestured to the food in front of us.
“More importantly, let’s eat, senior. I heard while getting the food that they put in a bit of extra effort today since new students arrived.”
“…Ahaha, hearing you say it, that does seem to be the case.”
With the atmosphere a little more relaxed, we were just about to start eating when—
“Hey, did you hear? Among this year’s new students, there’s that wretch from the Everglenn family.”
A voice whispered from not far away.
The hand I was using to tear bread froze mid-motion.
“What? Has the academy lost its mind? Even if they’re desperate for money, taking in something like that as a new student?”
“Just look at its behavior since yesterday. Would that have happened if it were in its right mind? In the old days, it would’ve been beheaded at the gate on the spot. My father even sighed about it—said the academy’s name has hit the dirt.”
“Wow, are they serious? Ha… this is driving me crazy. So, which dorm is it in?”
“Obviously Hilts. The Everglenns have always been a Hilts family.”
“Well, considering how many members of the royal family attend this academy… if it had gone to Crowns, that would’ve been outright treason. Treason.”
“Haha, maybe it can be executed alongside the headmaster and professors!”
They burst into coarse laughter, and I finally set my bread down.
Even when I almost openly looked their way, they didn’t notice, too absorbed in their snickering and gossip.
“Tch.”
Clicking my tongue softly, I picked up my water glass just to wet my throat.
If I didn’t, I felt like I might start spitting curses at them right here and now.
‘…Not that I have any room to talk.’
In my previous life, I hadn’t been much different from them.
Remembering that made my face burn.
It was from shame, self-disgust, and sheer contempt for myself.
“……”
…My chest felt tight, as if a lump of lead had been dropped inside me.
I let out a heavy sigh, forcing down the single thought that desperately came to mind.
‘If I could just have one drink, I’d die content.’
Of course, doing that now would be disastrous.
I quietly raised the glass, thinking only of soothing my chilled insides.
“…Hm?”
A familiar scent pricked my nose.
It was undeniably the feel and taste of a liquid that was not water.
When I lowered my head to check—
“……?”
The glass that had certainly been filled with water was now brimming with wine.