Chapter 15
The next few days repeated in similar ways. He would train his Running and Swimming skills twice, once in the morning and once in the evening. Sometimes the low tide stole the sea away, but Elijah wouldn’t let him skip a session, waking him up before dawn if necessary.
He had pushed himself like never before, without even complaining aloud. Only a few eye rolls at Elijah. He had never held his tongue this much.
The rest of the time Kai helped Theodora take care of the garden and the property. She drowned him with knowledge about botany. He did his best to understand and remember, asking appropriate questions and repeating to himself what he learned to fix it in his mind.
He had not spoken to Virya since the first day. Despite giving his all, he couldn’t help but wonder if he had done well enough.
Am I going to get kicked out? Am I good enough?
Elijah’s expressions ranged from cold to bored, it was impossible to tell what he was thinking. Dora had told him he was doing good and she seemed to genuinely be thinking it, but he might be wrong. Maybe she was trying to be nice.
These were the most exhausting and busy days Kai ever had in his life. He was completely spent both physically and mentally. His accommodations were the only highlight of his days. A nice bed and running water, plus the best food he ever had in this life.
He was not sure if this was what he wanted. They were yet to teach him something useful, but he wanted the ability to choose. Deciding to go home was one thing, getting kicked out was another.
As if summoned by his thoughts, Elijah’s voice sounded behind him, “Come. Lady Virya wants to see you.”
Turning around and finding him standing there was not a surprise anymore. Kai followed him in silence with the look of a man—or in this case a child—walking to his execution.
Entering the main building for the second time, Kai opened his eyes wide to look at the fascinating oddities adorning the house. The butler didn’t give him any time. By now he was sure he wasn’t a butler, but he liked to call him that anyway.
He was led beyond the main hall with the big wooden table, to a cozier room—which was still bigger than his house in Greenside.
Lady Virya sat in a comfortable armchair by the window. Resting on her knees, she had an old leather-bound tome he couldn’t read the title of. It was in a different alphabet from the one he had been taught.
Kai sat on the sofa opposite her, a small coffee table standing between them. Elijah had already made himself scarce.
After a week, Kai mostly got used to the different mana density around the estate, but he still felt uneasy standing in front of Virya. His subconscious had stopped screaming at him to run away, but the nervousness didn’t disappear.
After a couple more minutes, she closed her book with a clapping sound and put it aside.
“So, child, what do you think of your first week here?” Her orange eyes almost seemed to sparkle in the light, making him feel like she could see any thought he had.
What does she want me to say? That I didn’t learn anything about magic? That it was a walk in the park? Is she trying to put me on the spot like last time to see how I react?
Virya didn’t seem to mind that he took his time before answering, but her gaze was unnerving. After much debating, Kai decided getting straight to the point was the best course of action, “Was it some kind of test?”
“I suppose you could say that, but it was also an important lesson you had to understand. Can you tell me which one?”
“That you have to work hard to achieve something?” It was the most obvious answer and a bit banal, but he could not think of anything better.
Virya’s face gave no hint if that was the right answer, “That is exactly the point, but not the correct answer.”
What does that even mean?
Luckily, she didn’t stare at him, waiting for an answer he didn’t have.
Virya adjusted in her seat and leaned forwards, attracting his attention to the coffee table between them. A pile of pebbles, each no bigger than his thumbnail, rested on the wooden surface. Kai was pretty sure they hadn’t been there a moment ago and stared at them mystified.
“Stop looking at them as if they are hiding the secrets of the arcane arts. They're common pebbles I picked up on the beach this morning.”
Kai fell back in his seat. It wasn’t his fault no one in this house could act normally. She was the one that kept casually making things appear and disappear.
“I assume you know how to read and write, considering your father’s job and the way you eye each book you pass.” Kai gave a small nod, waiting for her to continue.
“Did your parents also teach you any math, child?”
Rellan didn’t teach him anything more than counting to a hundred, but Kai probably knew way more than he had, so he nodded.
“Yes, I know basic calculus.”
“Good, it will make this next part easier. Tell me if there is something you don’t understand.”
Without further ado, the pebbles arranged themselves in straight lines on the left side of the table.
One lonely pebble moved to the right. “This represents the Baquaire Archipelago, all the major and minor islands.” Virya began explaining. Next 150 more pebbles moved forward in another group, “This is the extension of the Merian Republic lands on the continent.”
Kai knew the Archipelago was considered not much more than a few rocks in the sea, but it wasn’t that small. The Veeryd Jungle alone covered a third of Yanlun and it was huge. He never thought the Republic was that big.
“How big is the Talthen continent exactly?” He couldn’t help but ask.
“I don’t have a large enough table in this house to represent it correctly using pebbles. That will be a lesson for another day.”
Kai stared dumbly at the hundreds of pebbles still on the side. The table in the hall was ten times this coffee table.
“Remain focused child, if you don’t even understand the Merian Republic, there is no point looking further.”
She gestured to where one small pebble was facing 150. “This is the difference in landmass, but it might be more useful to understand the difference in population.”
An army of pebbles joined the Merian Republic ranks till they had almost doubled.
“About 200 000 people are living in the Archipelago, the Republic has more than 70 million citizens.”
She didn’t expect him to understand those numbers, which was why she used the pebbles as a reference.
It wasn’t huge compared to the modern numbers on Earth, but they didn’t have industrial farming here. If you went back in time the Merian Republic population alone was comparable to the whole of Europe in the Middle Ages.
It was a bit more than Kai expected, but he could wrap his head around it. But Virya wasn’t done yet.
“Now, despite those numbers seeming very large to you, you must not think the Merian Republic is a very important or populous kingdom. The whole reason why they decided to annex the Baquaire Archipelago was a weak show of strength to improve their standing.
"They wish to be recognized as an established country, despite having been founded only one and a half thousand years ago. They hope nearby countries will hesitate to attack them directly if they act mighty.”
Ahahahah… only fifteen hundred years ago.
He knew time spans were considered differently, but it sounded so ridiculous he let out a chuckle, then he immediately regretted it. Virya looked dead serious, it didn’t seem like she was joking at all.
Kai’s mind was swarming with questions. Mistaking his thoughtful expression for confusion, Virya tried to make things easier to understand.
“You don’t have to worry about any other nation, just keep in mind the Republic is towards the bottom of the pack.
“Even then, on the mainland, 50% of the people in their lands are born with a race grade of Red ★★, 10% to 12% with Red ★★★ and around 1% with Orange ★ or higher. Do you know what 1% of 70 million is, child?”
He answered in a whisper, “It’s 700 thousand.”
If Virya was surprised he had answered, she didn’t let it show, “That is correct. There are almost a million people that at birth have a higher race grade than yours now. And most of them will have been surrounded by teachers and tutors since they were in the cradle.”
It wasn't an easy truth to stomach. It was like he had climbed a mountain from the day he was born, to later discover some people got a helicopter ride to the top. He could see them as they flew by smugly, while he could only keep climbing with his own two legs.
Kai had long known that some people were born luckier, but one thing was a vague idea, another was hard numbers. He felt comforted that he had his advantages. He might not beat them all, but that was fine. He had worked hard from the day he was born, that had to count for something. No other child could beat him on that.
After giving him a few seconds to process, Virya pulled him out of his thoughts and continued speaking.
“A higher grade means higher stats. Your muscles get stronger and more precise, your mind faster and your senses sharper. Naturally, it makes it easier to learn and progress skills. Not only that, with higher stats, each action you make is generally better , which increases the Life Experience from everyday activities.
“It’s true the boost Orange grade grants is not huge and both of the effects are minor. Especially if compared to what you get after learning a profession. But every little bit adds up. From the day they were born, they get a small advantage every day. That is true for the 1%, but also for around 8 million children with a Red ★★★ grade. They may not be as lucky as the 1%, but among so many, great talent and genius abound.”
Another one of his certainties fell. Kai always felt reassured that the Life Experience he gained was higher than his peers. Even if some people might be born luckier, he was improving faster, or so he had believed.
What did I even work for? Despite trying to improve my status from birth, so many newborns are just better than me.
He had accepted he wasn’t the hero of the story, but he had not thought there would be literally millions that had him beaten.
With the same inexorable persistence, Virya put the last nail in the coffin.
“Finally, remember that at Orange you have 14 skill slots. The 1% had them from birth and you can be sure their parents prepared a list of skills to teach them while they're in the womb.”
Kai sank into his seat, not sure how to respond. All the accomplishments he had felt so proud of were meaningless.
“Can you tell me the lesson I was trying to teach you now, child?” Virya's voice lacked her usual edge, he guessed that was the closest she would get to softening her tone.
Kai hesitated, his confident act long lost, “No matter how hard I work, some gaps cannot be closed…”
Virya suddenly seemed to tower over him despite not having moved, “What kind of idiot lesson would that be?!”
He jumped in his seat, surprised by the fire in her voice.
“If I thought you were helpless, I would have given you a couple tips and sent you your way.”
Virya leaned forward, nailing him with her gaze, her eyes like flames, as a nearly physical pressure pushed down on him.
“Listen to me carefully Kai. You are probably one of the most talented children in the entire Archipelago. You now need to make an important choice, what do you wish your future to be like? If you choose to leave, you can have a bright future on these islands without much effort.
“But if you wish to go beyond and compete with people who are born with many advantages over you, then the effort you put in this week will be nothing. Your path will never be easy, you’ll need to work three times as hard as them and you’ll need to do it every day of your life. That is the lesson I was trying to teach you.”
Virya relaxed her posture and tone, but her words still carried weight.
“I tested you this past week to see if you had the will necessary to take this choice into consideration. It’s still too soon to say for certain, but I see an ember in you, Kai. Whether it will grow or get snuffed out, I don’t know yet.”
She leaned back into her armchair and Kai released a breath he didn’t know he was holding.
“You’re too young to understand the implications, but you’re the only one who can make this decision. I wasn’t planning on taking a new student, but I’ll give you a chance if you are willing to go all the way.
“Now go, child. Your mother will be here soon. You can discuss this with her, no one will overhear your conversation. If you choose the first option, you can go back with her. I’ll give you enough coins to buy a house for your family wherever you want in the Archipelago. And to find another teacher. But if you decide to stay, I will not accept anything less than your utmost limit every day. You’ll think back to this past week as a relaxing holiday.”
With his head full of more thoughts than it could reasonably contain, Kai stood up and followed Elijah back to his quarters. His eyes did not wander to the mysterious relics on the walls on his way out.
Virya revealed a dozen pieces of information that could have kept him busy for weeks speculating, but his mind ignored all that for now. He had just been explicitly told he had to make the most important decision of his life.
He didn't realize he had sat by the sea like he did every morning in meditation, his thoughts were all there was.
The first instinct was to take the opportunity, but this wasn’t just him taking a chance and waiting to see where it went. There would be no more leisure or family time, he was signing every free hour of his foreseeable future to this.
Saying yes was easy, owning up to the consequences of that choice not so much. Everyone wanted to be the steadfast hero, who fought against the worst odds and still triumphed, but Kai knew he wasn’t that person. That person was a myth.
But could I become that?
Kai thought he had worked hard since he got reincarnated, Virya showed him it had been nothing. What if he tried his best and it still wasn’t enough?
Am I good enough?
That was the question he always secretly wondered, lately more than usual. He liked to joke about being a genius, but was he really that brilliant?
On the other hand, he was offered enough money to help his family and still get a teacher. He might not become someone outside of this Archipelago, but was it that bad? He lived in a tropical paradise for the spirits’ sake.
Maybe not Greenside, but we can always move somewhere else.
He could help his family and enjoy life. He may never change the world, but he could still make a difference. It would give him the power and security he desired, even if only on the islands.
If he chose to risk it and he didn’t match Virya’s standards, she would send him away and he would be left with nothing.
Kai had not noticed someone calling his name until Alana touched his shoulder.
“Have you already forgotten about your mother?” Alana said with fake anger, before looking worriedly at him.
“Is everything okay, sweetheart? If they have treated you badly, you can tell me. No one can mistreat my little boy, I’ll go talk some sense into them!”
Kai felt himself smiling and went to hug her tightly, forgetting his worries for a few precious seconds. Then he started explaining the situation.
They both walked on the beach under the midday sun, listening to the waves crashing to shore. Gathering his thoughts, Kai began to talk, slowly at first then so fast that Alana had to stop him to make sense of his speech.
He explained his current dilemma without leaving out a single detail. All the pros and cons he could think of all the scenarios he could imagine. His mother listened without interrupting.
“What do you think I should do?” Kai finally asked.
Alana stayed silent for a moment, staring at the ocean, the sun was now much lower behind them. Then she turned to look at him, appearing a bit sad.
“Kai, I knew you were mature for your age, but I never realized how much. Maybe if I didn’t let you go through so much, you wouldn’t have been forced to grow up so fast.”
He was about to argue, but she gently shushed him.
“I know it wasn’t my fault, but it was my duty to protect you and I should have done a better job.”
“Mom, I can take care of myself.”
“Kai—.”
This time he was the one to interrupt. “It’s not what you think, Mom.”
Even if Virya didn’t keep her word, they were so far from the mansion that no one else could hear them. Not that he thought she was lying, she had no need for that with someone like him.
He had not planned it, but at this moment Kai knew he had to come clean if he didn’t want to build their relationship on a pile of lies. He hesitated for a second, trying to gather the courage to tell the truth. It was like the words were stuck in his throat.
I want to do this.
Kai took a deep breath and spoke without stopping, “When I was born, I had memories of a previous life. A previous life in a very different world without mana or any kind of magic.”
A heavy weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he could breathe easier.
Kai turned to look at Alana. She was pale, her face a mask of shock and confusion. It was all that he had feared to see. His mother's warm and gentle eyes now showed doubt, her doubt towards him, towards her own son. It lasted just moments, but she could not hide it, despite her best attempts.
“Wha— Do yo—” She tried to say something, but soon fell quiet, and so did everything around them. All sounds were drowned by his own heartbeat: Kai could feel the pulse in his ears and it deafened him. Cold sweat ran down Kai‘s back despite the heat, a gut-wrenching fear taking over.
The silence stretched for interminable moments.
Did I make the biggest mistake of my life?
“Mom, I’m still m—”
Alana hugged him, a few tears running down her eyes. “Of course you are, I always knew you were special. I’m not sure I understand it all, but you’ll always be my son.”
Kai felt his eyes turn moist. A few seconds later he was sobbing like a child in his mother’s arms.
He would have liked to say he quickly managed to calm down, but by the time he left his mom’s embrace, the sun was a bit lower.
“So, how was your other life… was it happy?” Alana asked him.
Thinking about it a bit, Kai didn’t know where to start, but if he had to describe his life in a sentence…
“I was sick most of my life, then I died young.”
“Oh, sweetheart. I’m so sorry, you—”
“It’s not as bad as it seems mom, I had a nice life. That world was very different from this one.”
He tried to explain a few things, but each fact needed ten more facts to be understood. There was so much he wanted to say, he had waited so long to talk to someone about this. But the sun was inching closer to the horizon, and they still had not made a decision.
Now that she knew the truth, he would have time to say everything he wanted, just not now. Kai reluctantly switched the topic back to his current dilemma. He had a decision to make.