Cass was a little hesitant this time as he approached the white, glowing area. As it came more into focus, he was able to pick out the wrought iron white patio furniture. This time, however, it wasn’t empty.
Lord Blackburn was already sitting there, but this time, there was a tea set placed in front of him on the small wrought iron table. Two cups sat on either side of the table, as if it had been set for a long time, and a trail of steam rose from the teapot. When Lord Blackburn saw Cass, he stood up hastily, almost falling over.
His calm expression was slightly ruffled, his expression scrunched up and Cass’ immediate worry was that he had done something so awful that Lord Blackburn was upset with him.
Cass couldn’t even begin to imagine what he’d done that could have upset him. There were too many things to pick from.
"I apologise, Caspian." Lord Blackburn blurted the words out, seeming to surprise not just Cass, but himself with the force of his words. He covered his mouth right away, looking embarrassed. "I-Forgive me. I seemed to have worked myself up while I was waiting for you." Lord Blackburn apologised, bowing slightly and Cass felt his jaw drop.
Why the hell was he apologising to him?!
"You have nothing to apologise for, Lord Blackburn. I...I feel like I’ve done a lot of things with your body that I should apologise for." Cass muttered, shifting awkwardly on his feet as the two of them remained standing. Awkward, and so similar that it was a little eerie.
"No no, you did nothing wrong. You did the best with the information that you had at hand. And...unlike me, they seem to like you." They were soft words, but speared through Cass completely. Cass closed his eyes, dropping his head as the pain from the words pierced him.
It was so fucking unfair that Lord Blackburn was alienated even in his own body. It was also unfair that Cass was living out what might have been his fantasy.
"You like Lucian, don’t you?" Cass asked, raising his head and catching the way that Lord Blackburn’s eyes widened in shock. His lips openly slightly, his red eyes wide, but it was the telltale flush across his ears that told Cass the truth.
Cass didn’t blush like that, but this was a damn romance novel. All the ones that were shy and reacted harshly towards the people that they liked were quiet blushers too. Therefore, this was a clear sign to Cass.
No matter what Lord Blackburn said, he did like him. In some way.
Cass took a step towards the man, and Lord Blackburn put out a cautious hand behind him, catching the edge of the chair in his hand as Cass took several steps towards him.
"I-I have no idea where you got that idea-" Lord Blackburn tried to protest, but Cass had smelt the blood in the water. He’d had the thought last time, but now that things had advanced, gone past a point that Cass knew he couldn’t turn back, he needed to get an answer out of the man.
"Are you upset with what I am doing with him? Are you okay with this? I know you said that I did what I had to do, but seriously, Lord Blackburn, are you actually okay? Plus, it isn’t just Lucian anymore." Cass said, coming to a stop a few paces away from the other man.
He was taller than Lord Blackburn, himself in this realm, and it was a little odd to see the face that had been staring back at him for over a month up close like this.
Cass could admit easily that Lord Blackburn was a handsome man, that was never something that was hard to agree on. However, he was not someone that Cass would go for. He was...well, first off, Lord Blackburn’s form was far healthier then he actually was in real life. He had had enough meat on his bones in this version of him. Plump, but in a good way.
He looked...serious, dangerous, but handsome.
Cass was sure he looked dull compared to the white haired, red eyed beauty. With his brown hair and brown eyes, he was a dime a dozen. There was a reason that Sam looked the way that he did.
He blended in, like Cass would have if he had come to this world as himself.
Lord Blackburn let out a shaky breath, scanning Cass’ face for himself before he closed his eyes, shaking his head slightly. It was so slight, Cass almost missed it with his own mind lost in his own thoughts.
"I am not upset." Lord Blackburn began, clearing his throat. "You should sit down. I...prepared our favourite tea." He said. It was a shy declaration, and Cass was startled to realise that the man was right.
While Cass had not really had a fondness for the tea before, he had now grown used to the taste and had missed it while he had been apart from Sam. It was strange to realise that things were changing about him. He didn’t feel like he was becoming more like Lord Blackburn in earnest, but there were parts of him that were adapting to this new life.
Cass nodded, turning, and sitting down. Lord Blackburn did the same, and Cass took a moment to look around them. He was checking to see if this garden was actually a mimic of Fiona’s, and he found that it didn’t quite line up. Some things were a little off, and that stuck with Cass for a moment before Lord Blackburn cleared his throat.
He was pouring them both a cup of tea, with everything already prepared inside of the cups. Cass watched as he lifted up a spoon, stirring each cup before he pushed Cass’ closer to him. Cass stared at it, curious, until he realised that Lord Blackburn was asking him to take a sip.
Cass flushed, scrambling to pick up the cup without looking desperate. When he raised the cup to his lips, Lord Blackburn looked pleased, but like he was still anticipating something. Cass blinked, staring down at the cup, before he took another sip, and then another. Each sip seemed to make Lord Blackburn brighten.
"Is it any good?" He asked and Cass nodded, surprised.
"This is delicious. You brewed this yourself?" Cass asked, and the man was practically beaming as he nodded. He wasn’t really smiling, but it was in the way he was holding himself. His fingers were twitching, the corners of his mouth weren’t lying flat, and there was a brightness to his eyes that made him look younger.
He was...cute. Very cute. It was a strange thing to grapple with,
"About what you asked earlier." Lord Blackburn began, his ears turning pink again. "I think I need to make something very clear. While I am still alive, this body is yours, Caspian. I can’t take control of it anymore." Lord Blackburn said. Cass had to put his cup down, shock running through his veins.
"That’s not true! You were able to take over a couple of times in the past!" He protested, and Lord Blackburn gave him a soft look.
"Taking over for mere seconds does not mean that I can actually take over again, Caspian. I’m alright with it, truly. I can tell you’re about to say that this is not fair." Lord Blackburn said, his eyes smiling at Cass.
Cass hated that he was right. His hand was clenched in his lap, anger a pulse inside of him.
"Of course I’m going to complain! This isn’t right! I didn’t know what would happen to you when I took over, and I would never have agreed if you were going to lose so much!" Cass told him. Lord Blackburn stared at him as he raged, a soft, kind look in his eyes before he closed them and sighed.
"And this, dear Caspian, is why they were looking for someone like you to take my place in my own story." Cass halted at his calm words. His resigned words. When he opened his eyes, he stared at the angry Caspian, a man angry for him, and grinned. "You have a good soul despite everything, Caspian. I’ve seen your memories too. The ones you’ll allow me to see." Lord Blackburn said with a little smirk, and Cass felt his breath catch.
He was comparing them, saying that they were similar.
"I-I never intentionally-" Cass started and Lord Blackburn laughed.
"It’s okay. I assumed as much. I have a lot of free time right now, so I’ve noticed I’ve become a rather nosy person. Which is why I often find myself watching your life in times that I shouldn’t." His ears were pink again and he cleared his throat.
Cass felt his own face turn red. The air was awkward for a long moment, before Lord Blackburn sighed.
"Alright. There is no use dancing around it. I don’t think you should take my prior feelings into account in any action you have moving forward. Romantically, at the very least." He clarified, and Cass sat back in his chair.
"Why not? This is your fucking body, you should have a say in it! It’s your heat, for fucks sake!" Cass shouted, then gasped and slapped his hands over his mouth. He had not just called it that to his face! What was wrong with him?
Lord Blackburn stared at him blankly, not at all sure what Cass had just said.
"My...what?" Lord Blackburn asked slowly, and Cass groaned. He slid his hands up, covering his face. What in the world had he just done?
"Forget what I just said." Cass muttered, and Lord Blackburn let out a harsh laugh.
"I can’t, not when the word you said is shockingly accurate." Lord Blackburn said, and Cass flinched. That’s why he had never called it that. He knew it would stick as soon as he said it. "It starts like that, and then becomes a haunting hunger that never leaves." Lord Blackburn was being...mild with its description, but he was probably doing that for both of their sakes.
After all, they had both experienced it.
"I...I’m glad that you finally asked for help." Lord Blackburn said quietly, and Cass’ head shot up out of his hands to stare at the man. He wasn’t blushing, his face wasn’t flushed, but he was shocked. Stunned that Lord Blackburn had said that.
"Lord Blackburn, I-"
"We’re far past the point where it makes sense for you to call me Lord Blackburn, Lord Blackburn." Lord Blackburn said, smirking as he stared at Cass’ shocked expression. "Call me Cassian. Not many had the privilege to do so."