Gravity fluctuation (2)
The look as if asking what I was doing after things were going well. I just wanted to make her stop crying so much, but maybe it worked too well, because now the atmosphere had turned icy.
"... Sorry. It was just too shocking."
I swallowed the water I had in my mouth and cautiously read the room. The word "shocking" wasn't a lie.
I had thought Nadia had been born in Reformist-controlled territory and had been abused. That alone was already horrific. But the truth was far more appalling.
Her father had locked his daughter away in a tiny room and neglected her, then manipulated her into making something called a bio-circuit, letting her do nothing but that. When she refused to create more, he used violence, and in the end, tried to kill her.
By my standards of what constitutes family, that wasn't something that could exist. Having the same blood meant being the closest of relatives.
Yet Neo, the current Reformist leader, had ignored all of that. Blood ties seemed to mean nothing to him.
Nadia, under my gaze, started to speak in a calm—or rather, pretending-to-be-calm—manner.
"You can curse him if you want. I'm never going to be manipulated by that monster again."
"..."
"Do you remember what I said last time? When I talked about Celestia's brother."
"It was about emotions, right?"
"You remember. I'm glad."
Back then, what Nadia had said was this: don't get swept up in emotions. Don't let them pile up. You have to let them out and dilute them however you can. That's the only way to endure.
"Now that there's even been a hit ordered on my life, there's nothing left to maintain. ... I wanted to somehow hold on, but it turns out nothing goes as you wish, no matter how much you want it."
Children can't choose their parents. Parents also don't get to choose their children. But they do have one choice the children do not: whether or not to raise them.
If you bring a child into this world, you have to raise them. You have to take responsibility. Even without resorting to those trite words, it's something that's obviously, rightfully, to be upheld. But occasionally, some lack even that basic boundary.
There's a saying on Earth, about severing the bonds of heaven. Even those people would deserve tearing apart for that, so ordering a hit to directly kill their child was beyond comparison.
"You mean the hit was... other Reformists?"
"Yeah, that's right. I guess they didn't want my information to spread, so it hasn't really blown up. Well, obviously—they'll want to keep the bio-circuit from becoming known."
Nadia told me that due to being forcibly extracted from her original bio-circuit, most of her skills in handling equipment have been sealed. It's not a complete shutdown, so it still assists with handling heavy machinery like Big Hand, but anything beyond that is impossible for now.
"Are you okay now?"
At my worried question, Nadia hesitated for a moment, then nodded.
"That woman—no, Licorice helped me in several ways. Thanks to her, as far as they're concerned, I'm already dead."
I was honestly surprised to hear that Licorice had helped Nadia. This was the first I'd heard of it. Licorice wasn't someone who helped others quietly. If he helped, he always made sure to get compensation.
'So that's why she didn't get too mad when Licorice called her Woof-woof?'
Still, it seemed odd. Comparing being called Woof-woof to covering up such sensitive information was laughable.
If Nadia had really liked Licorice, maybe I could see it, but the two of them were always so awkward when left together. Nadia, not Licorice, seemed to dislike it even more.
I figured I'd have to find a chance to ask about this separately. Since Nadia had told me about her past first, maybe I could let my guard down a little.
"If it's discovered that I'm alive, they might try to kill or kidnap me again, but honestly, I don't think that's likely now. Look at the way the world has become."
This world. I figured out what she meant—the world now overflowing with mutants because of pureblood supremacist terrorist attacks.
It didn't just happen in Titan—every area touched by humanity had been affected, so things must be pure chaos in the Reformist territories, too. Maybe they'd already collapsed.
"Anyway, that's all for my story. I don't want to talk about unpleasant things anymore."
Nadia wiped her still-wet eyes. In a short time, her eyelids had swollen. When I glanced at them, she turned her head away, embarrassed.
Maybe she thought I'd tease her if I stayed quiet, because she changed the subject.
"Hyun-woo, don't you have any worries? If you're keeping something bottled up, tell me. We're partners, after all."
Nadia, now feeling lighter after unloading everything she'd been piling up, leaned into me and looked up.
'A worry, huh...'
I didn't have anything as serious as Nadia's past, but there was one thing nagging at me: the fact that I had been an experiment. Even though I'd acted like it was no big deal in front of others, I couldn't help but think about it.
"I keep thinking about what kind of experiment I was put through."
Whether I was someone else's clone, or the original. If I was experimented on, what kind of experiments were done? Even if I hadn't wanted it, had I consumed countless lives in that forgotten past? Questions like that tormented me.
"I only survived thanks to this power, but knowing how I got it and because of whom, I can't exactly feel good about it."
"..."
"Even putting everything else aside, the thing that bothers me most is this: what am I? Honestly, I'm not all that different from mutants like ghouls or mimics—"
"No!"
Maybe I was a kind of monster, too. After all, even the ghouls had once backed away upon seeing me. But that line of thought disappeared at Nadia's outburst. Her shout made me flinch and lower my gaze, only to see Nadia glaring furiously.
Normally, even when she pouted, it wasn't scary, but with her eyes blazing like that, she was really fierce.
"Who told Hyun-woo those kinds of things?"
"Well, um... It's not like anyone did..."
"Then!"
"It's just... you saw it too, right? Those ghouls pretending to be human. That made me think. Maybe I'm like them—"
"I said, no!"
Nadia shouted even more forcefully. I wilted. She asked me, I answered, and now she was scolding me—what was the point?
She checked me over sternly and muttered quietly, even glancing behind me as a bonus.
"If it's here, no one else will see."
I barely had a moment to focus on her near-whisper before I was startled by Nadia's sudden action. She suddenly opened her coat and grabbed my hand, placing it right onto her exposed chest.
I didn't even have time to ask what the hell she was doing. Before words could come, softness and warmth reached me first.
Nadia asked quietly,
"Can you feel it? The sound of my heartbeat."
Thump-thump. Beneath her serious face, I could clearly feel her tense heart beating powerfully.
"The scar is still there... but that's not what matters. What matters is that it's a life Hyun-woo saved."
At her words, my confusion died down. Through the gaps in my fingers, I could see the scar. It was evidence that the Reformists had forcefully removed the original bio-circuit implanted near Nadia's heart.
"Monsters don't save people."
Nadia leaned her upper body, as if to wrap around my hand. She kept my hand pinned, searching my face with her small fingers.
"And they don't have this kind of warmth, either."
Her jewel-like green eyes still glistened with unshed tears as she looked at me.
"Human, or monster—I think it's humanity that makes the difference. To me, monsters are people like Neo, and no matter how strong Hyun-woo is, you're human to me. No matter how you change, you're the same."
Being human—it doesn't just mean appearance, she said, and never looked away from me.
"Maybe others didn't notice, but I know better than anyone how hard you've worked, Hyun-woo."
She said I had done the amazing feat of getting the biocell, and running to Heaven right after the incident was incredibly courageous.
She kept listing things I'd done, one after another. It felt like I hadn't achieved much, so I tried to stop her before she went on all night.
After unloading her feelings, Nadia seemed satisfied and lightly bumped her forehead against me. Not a 'thump', but a soft 'pop'. A gentle vibration.
"So please, stop saying things like you're a monster. If anyone says that, bring them to me. I'll flatten them. Even if I haven't fixed Big Hand yet, I can still squash them with Carry."
Everyone here practically owes you their lives, so someone who talks like that is the real monster. Nadia said this as she looked up, determined, shaking a fist.
"That's reassuring."
"Right? That's what being a partner is all about."
Nadia looked so proud it was almost comical. Seeing her lips curl up, I laughed.
Mental resilience isn't as strong as people think. It only seems that way because it's elastic, but once it's pushed past its limits, it breaks easily.
We had barely survived against monsters. To keep surviving, we had to become monsters, too. Only then, perhaps, could we withstand the hardships.
At least that's how I had thought. But maybe you don't need to fall that far. Just a moment ago, I was comforting her, but before I knew it, the roles had reversed.
Maybe this is what being true partners is—doing things together that can't be done alone.
"Come to think of it, it's you who let me realize all this. Pretty much everything I've accomplished started because of you, Hyun-woo. Maybe I've just been tamed by you."
Tamed. That's not the kind of thing partners say to each other. It felt heavy. Sensing my discomfort, Nadia chuckled softly.
"I mean it in a precious way. You're basically my whole world, Hyun-woo."
"Same for me."
"Then let's just say we tamed each other."
"That's kind of a weird way to put it, though?"
I knew what she meant, but it still felt odd. Unlike me, Nadia seemed unfazed and declared firmly.
"In any case, stop saying angsty things like you're a monster. It makes me upset. Got it? Seriously, quit it. Unless you want to hear how a fox cries."
"I already heard plenty of that earlier, didn't I?"
I meant it as a tease, but Nadia just breezed right through it. She even snorted as if I'd gotten it wrong.
"Oh, don't worry. That wasn't my real cry. Anyway, I like things just the way they are now."
I wasn't sure what that meant. With a look at my expression, Nadia encouraged me to try if I was curious. I wondered where her confidence came from, but decided to just let it go.
I had a hunch that if I pushed it, something major would happen.
'That's exactly the look.'
It was the same face Nadia made when there was delicious food in front of her. The same one she'd shown every time we went to Robert's restaurant—now gone forever.
After a wave of oddly unexplainable tension passed between us, Nadia and I ended up bursting out laughing as we looked at each other.
'Yeah, let's not overthink things.'
Monster or not, experiment or not, what I had to do didn't change. My focus was simply escaping the corpse-strewn, icebound moon Titan for Earth.
I could figure out the rest later. There'd be plenty of time to wallow in thoughts then. For now, keep things simple—that's probably the secret to survival.
Soaking in Nadia's warmth, I let out a mutter.
"What a godforsaken world, huh?"
"But it's not all bad. It feels like there's some balance now. Even if it's still way off, if there weren't even this much, I wouldn't exist in this world."
Nadia gave a small smile.
***
Hiding among icicles, Nadia and I enjoyed a brief spell of freedom, laughing and goofing around, until we got a call from Licorice.
I was sorry our break time ended, but now was the time to move. We promised each other to make time like this again, and headed to the place she'd designated.
On the way, we ran into—not Kanna herself, but her teammates. Since we'd exchanged greetings once before, this time it all felt quite familiar.
Since we were apparently heading to the same place, I took the opportunity to ask what I'd been curious about.
"Did the operation succeed? All I heard was that Carry went to you guys, so I don't know the details."
"The operation... it was a half—no, not even half a success. Honestly, calling it a success is embarrassing."
"Huh? Why? Was Whiteout's head not much use?"
"The effect was weaker, but that's not the issue. The thing is... let me explain..."
Kanna's team, continuing Captain Edward's will, carried on with the mission. They told me what had happened after we parted ways.
While they were resting and recovering their exhausted bodies, Carry returned in a hurry. Seeing it was damaged and we were nowhere in sight, they realized something was wrong.
They'd planned to search for us, but Carry insisted they head for the town, flashing the biocell and making a scene. So they gave up the search and continued the mission.
Carry had shown them that it was already too late and that they couldn't defeat Lobelia and Blackout.
After agreeing with Carry, they headed for the reactor chamber. Even when they shoved Whiteout's head forward, some mutants still attacked.
The effect was wearing off, but it was fine—they weren't being swarmed all at once, and there was still a hesitation effect, so they could get through rather easily.
"We basically fought our way into the reactor chamber. But the big problem happened at the reactor itself: the energy was gone."
"The reactor's energy was depleted?"
"Yes. It was leaking. We found out the cause—it was the plant in the hydroponics lab. The roots of that plant were absorbing the energy."
He told me that the mutated plant was using that energy to further mutate, and since the number of mutants was lower than expected, they checked the roots—and found corpses seemingly being absorbed.
"We managed to transmit what remained, but probably not even thirty percent of our original goal. Captain Kanna will explain in detail, so let's go inside."
When we entered the tent, Kanna spoke as if she'd been waiting for us.
"We're going to our base, Keter."
"Excuse me?"
"We're going to take it back."
"... What?"
"Right now, traitors have surely handed it over to the pureblood supremacists, but with you on our side we can kill them all. I know a secret route inside."
I stared at Kanna in a daze. She slammed the table, burning with vengeance. I was already surprised by her appearance, but her sudden declaration shocked me even more.
It was right after I arrived at the operations room at Licorice's call.
-------------= Clacky's Corner -------------=
I didn't know where it would go after the Town was destroyed but it seems they're going to take back Keter.
【ദ്ദി(⩌ᴗ⩌)】